Is my husband entitled to take my salary?
Your salary is yours, and you may give some of it to him as a kind of free-will contribution.
Does buying meat equivalent to the weight of a slaughtered animal and distributing it avail for an udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
That does not avail for the sacrifice (uḍḥiyyah), because the sacrifice necessarily requires slaughtering an animal from the category of anʿām (camels, cattle, and sheep/goats) within a specified time.
Rather, that is considered a form of charity (ṣadaqah) for which one is rewarded. And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is it a condition for the mosque where I‘tikaf is performed to hold Jumu‘ah prayers?
No, it is not a condition for the mosque where I‘tikaf is performed to have Jumu‘ah prayers. However, if a person vows to perform continuous I‘tikaf, and Jumu‘ah occurs within that period, then they must observe I‘tikaf in a mosque where Jumu‘ah is held so that they do not break their continuity by leaving for Friday prayer.
What is the ruling on performing istinja' before every ablution?
Istinja' is not from the conditions for the validity of ablution. It is only obligatory for prayer when there is impurity from urine or stool on the private part, or if there is fear of the impurity spreading to the body or clothing. And Allah the Almighty knows best.