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Dealing with Family Violence and Methods of Preventing it
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-02-2022

Dealing with Family Violence and Methods of Preventing it

 

 

Family violence (also called domestic violence) has caused societal, economic, psychological, health-related issues since psychological complexes resulting from this type of violence usually develop into aggravated medical conditions, aggressive or criminal behavior, and those subjected to such violence are likely to inflict it on others. Loosening of family ties, lack of trust and insecurity may lead to the vanishing of the family altogether since it is the nucleus of society and any threat it faces-through this violence - will eventually lead to undermining society as a whole.

 

Therefore, among the key solutions for the phenomenon of family violence is compliance with the provisions of Islamic Sharia, adopting its teachings, and applying them in family life. This is starts from the moment of searching for a life partner, having children, and raising them in a certain manner. Actually, Islam isn`t limited to performing acts of worship; rather, it is a way of life. Consequently, it is necessary to clarify the purpose of Sharia behind the verses and prophetic narrations in which "beating" was mentioned to prevent misusing them in the name of Islam.

 

Being the nucleus in the upbringing process and providing its members with the correct behavior, the family has shouldered huge responsibilities in different areas in a bid to protect its members from this violence. Some of these responsibilities are:

 

  • Adopting informed dialogue amongst its members.
  • Treating children equally and satisfying their psychological, social, material, and behavioral needs.
  • Participating with children on the moral and physical levels through becoming best friends in order to instil confidence in their hearts.
  • Minimizing TV shows showing violent content through instilling principles and morality in them from an early age.
  • Following up on their academic progress and developing their creative skills and hidden talents.
  • Enhancing love of country and society.
  • Living with each other in kindness and equity.
  • Putting an end to the phenomenon of divorce.

 

Moreover, media plays a pivotal role in guiding and correcting behavior. This role crystallizes in allocating media channels to help the family overcome domestic violence and utilizing commercial breaks to broadcast awareness-raising messages. This is in addition to disseminating the culture of respect for the opposite sex, acquainting men with the rights of women, training the family on addressing problems along with raising mothers` awareness - through targeted programs-about age and stages of child`s development. Also, uncovering the reasons leading to this violence, preventing it, and highlighting this phenomenon through citation of evidence. Moreover, raising awareness of family about the adverse psychological and social effects of violence on both the individual and society. Further, printing and publishing booklets clarifying the psychological effect of this violence on the children.

 

The role of school is no longer limited to teaching since we live in an era that enabled man to learn through utilizing various means of communication. Accordingly, school must play a leading role in educating the community and guiding the behavior of its members via different programs that it prepares and projects that it adopts. School can help prevent domestic violence through raising the awareness of mothers and fathers. This can be achieved by addressing societal issues and finding the effective solutions, combating unusual behavior, emphasizing the importance of volunteerism, in addition to making voluntary contributions.

 

Raising awareness on the religious, social, intellectual, cultural, and legal levels, in addition to acquainting members of society with their rights and duties, is amongst the best means to end this phenomenon. However, this has to come in different forms, such as training, workshops, rehabilitation, lectures, booklets, brochures, conferences, seminars; utilizing all available means like media organizations as well as government and non-government institutions.

 

In this context, we stress the role undertaken by male and female spiritual guides and mosque preachers in terms of raising awareness and offering advice and guidance; particularly since our society is influenced by religious guidance and discourse, which are based on clear principles of Sharia.

 

Some of the key solutions that actively participate in curbing domestic violence are:

 

  • Offering the necessary advice and guidance to protect society from domestic violence.
  • Providing psychological, social, and familial counselling to members of families suffering from domestic violence.
  • Establishing a connection between the victims of domestic violence and the available counselling organizations through providing hotlines, which enable the latter to give assistance if needed.
  • Providing secure places for women and children to make them feel safe, even temporarily, and to enable specialists to provide the necessary assistance.
  • Teaching women and children to develop security plans inside and outside home.
  • Cooperating with family and children organizations to find solutions that suit each individual family.
  • Training children to have non-violent reactions to blow off some steam considering the violence they have been subjected to.
  • Teaching positive behavior to children to enable them control anger and negative emotions to help them form sound and safe relationships in the future.

And all praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds.

 

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

I`m married to an American citizen who used to be married to a man in Mexico and filed for divorce there. It is worth pointing that in America she isn`t registered as married. When she arrived in Jordan, her lawyer called and told her that she got the divorce, and based on this we got married in Jordan. What is the ruling of Sharia on this?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of The Worlds. May His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
 
You haven`t mentioned whether this woman has converted to Islam or not. If she had embraced Islam and three menstrual cycles passed, but her first husband hasn`t converted to Islam, then her relationship with him is over. If you married her after this (Passing of three menstrual cycles and first husband not having embraced Islam) then your marriage is valid. However, if she didn`t convert to Islam then your marriage contract with her is invalid and you have to wait until she gets divorced by her first husband and observes Iddah, which is three menstrual cycles. Afterwards, you can conclude the marriage contract. We pray that Allah doesn`t hold you to account for what you have done because you thought she was divorced. We recommend that you seek Allah`s forgiveness as much as you can and do righteous deeds. We also advise you to marry a Muslim woman to preserve your and your children`s religion since Almighty Allah Says (What means): "Wed not idolatresses till they believe…" [Al-Baqarah/ 221]. It is true that marrying a Kitabi (One who believes in a book of sacred scriptures and with whom a Muslim may marry in what is deemed a lawful marriage) is permissible, it involves great risks, as stated in the aforementioned verse. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
 

What is the Islamic ruling on parents asking son to divorce his wife?

Praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds.

If their asking him to do so is justified in Sharia, then there is no blame on him to obey them. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

It was found out that a man divorced his wife for the third time in 2005, but they continued cohabiting as man and wife. However, when they realized that what they were doing was unlawful, they came the Iftaa` Department in 2009 and were told that they can`t be together. What is the position of Sharia on this couple?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
Her Iddah* period starts after the third divorce. As for the continued cohabitation, it is unlawful because being ignorant about the rulings of Sharia while in Dar Al-Islam* is no valid excuse. If a baby came as the fruit of this unlawful consummation of marriage, then a judge of Sharia has the final say in this regard because lineage is a serious matter. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
* ʿIddah: a specified period of time that must elapse before a Muslim widow or divorcee may legitimately remarry. The Qurʾān (Sura,2/verse,228) prescribes that a menstruating woman have three monthly periods before contracting a new marriage; the required delay for a nonmenstruating woman is three lunar months.
* Dar Al-Islam: designates a territory where Muslims are free to practice their religion, though this often implies the implementation of Islamic law, whereas Dar al-Harb represents those lands ruled by non-believers

We collect funds from mosques and other sources, saying: "For the poor, the needy, widows, orphans, and those who do not beg insistently." After paying the stipends of the families registered with the Zakat Committee, an amount exceeding 6,000 dinars remained. Is it permissible for me to save it for upcoming months when I may not be able to collect the stipends?

These funds are received by the committee as representatives of the zakat payers to deliver zakat to those entitled to it. It is well-known that delaying zakat while being able to pay it is not permissible. Imam Al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: "Zakat must be paid immediately if one is able to do so, by the presence of wealth and the eligible categories." [Al-Minhaj] Therefore, the committee must distribute the zakat to the eligible recipients without installment payments or using it to purchase material goods for them, as the committee does not have authority over the poor to allocate it in this way. And Allah Knows Best.