What is the ruling on not fulfilling a vow?
A vow is a commitment towards Allah, The Almighty, and so, it should be observed as much as possible, and it is impermissible to take it lightly. Allah, The Exalted, Says –in commending the believers (What means): "(Because) they perform the vow and fear a day whereof the evil is wide-spreading." [Al-Insan/7].
Is Iddah (waiting period) incumbent on an old woman whose husband had died?
Upon the death of the husband, Iddah is incumbent on the wife regardless of their age. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for the young woman to turn the suitor down if she had no feelings for him?
Yes, it is permissible for her to do so.
When is Istikharah (guidance prayer) Du`a offered, before Tasleem (saying asalamu alikum warahmatu allah wa barakatuh to end the prayer), or after it?
It is offered after Tasleem.