Is hair extension permissible?

All Perfect Praise is due to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds 

It is impermissible for the man and the woman to apply a human`s hair as extension, but using artificial hair is permissible for the married woman after obtaining the approval of her husband so long as non-Mahrams don`t see her. And Allah Knows Best.

Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?

No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.

Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?

Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.

Is it permissible for a woman to visit the doctor while in her `Iddah (waiting period)?

It is permissible for her to do that during day time, but it is impermissible for her to leave her house at night except for a sound reason. And Allah Knows Best.