Should one obey his mother even if she was wrong?
Obeying one`s mother is an obligation in matters that are beneficial to her and so long as she didn't drive her children to commit an act of sin.
Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law?
It is forbidden for the woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law because he isn`t a Mahram (unmarriageable) of hers.
Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.
I have mixed (halal and haram) money, and I want to purify it. My father is poor, and I want him, my mother, and my mother-in-law to perform Hajj, along with myself and my wife, as they need care due to their old age. Is it permissible to use this money for Hajj, or what should I do with it? Please advise.
If you knew the exact amount of unlawful money, then you should give as a charity, and if didn't then try to figure out the closest amount in order to give it as a charity.
As for performing Hajj, perform it by using your lawful money. May Allah Bless you for being dutiful to your parents and your mother in law and for your attempt to serve them, And Allah Knows Best.