Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
How should I deal with the whispers of the devil with regard to ablution and purity?
Whispers in ablution are from the devil, and so you should take refuge in Allah from the devil`s evil suggestions that aim to distort the religion. Thus, once an organ is completely pure, don`t question its purity since having whispers doesn`t mean that the purity is invalid as it has already been established.
How are those killed in wars punished with the torment of the grave if they are not buried?
The torment of the grave refers to the suffering that the deceased experiences between the day of their death and the Day of Resurrection, which is called the Barzakh period. Similarly, it includes the blessings of the grave, whether the deceased is buried or not. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best
Is it permissible for a girl to wear colored contact lenses?
All Perfect Praise is due to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds.
Wearing colored contact lenses for medical treatment is permissible, and wearing them as an adornment is also permissible, provided that she isn`t seen while having them on by non-Mahrams. And Alalh Knows Best.