Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.
Is it a condition for the mosque where I‘tikaf is performed to hold Jumu‘ah prayers?
No, it is not a condition for the mosque where I‘tikaf is performed to have Jumu‘ah prayers. However, if a person vows to perform continuous I‘tikaf, and Jumu‘ah occurs within that period, then they must observe I‘tikaf in a mosque where Jumu‘ah is held so that they do not break their continuity by leaving for Friday prayer.
What should the one performing the slaughter say at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah to say the following supplication at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah:
"Bismillāhi wallāhu Akbar, Allāhumma laka wa ilayka, hādhihi 'aqīqatu fulān."
("In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of [the child's name].")
This is based on what al-Bayhaqī narrated in Al-Sunan al-Kubrā (Vol.9/P.511), that the Prophet ﷺ said: "Slaughter it in his name and say: In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of so-and-so."
And Allah Almighty knows best.
What is the Islamic ruling on smearing the head of the newborn with the blood of the `Aqiqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is disliked (makrūh) to smear the head of the newborn with the blood of the 'aqīqah, as this is a practice that belongs to the customs of the pre-Islamic era of ignorance (Jāhiliyyah). What is Sunnah instead is to anoint the newborn's head with saffron or another pleasant fragrance. And Allah Almighty knows best.