Can a person required to give kaffarah feed it to their own family members?
The kaffarah must be given to the poor and needy who are not financially dependent on the one giving the kaffarah.
If a person feeds it to their own family members, it does not count as kaffarah, and their obligation remains unfulfilled.
What is the wisdom and purpose behind the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
Among the wisdoms and purposes of the 'aqīqah are the following:
First: Expressing joy at the blessing of Allah the Almighty, rejoicing in the newborn, and giving thanks to Allah for this gift. Allah the Almighty says (what means): "If you are grateful, I will surely increase you." [Ibrāhīm/7]
Second: Proclaiming and publicising the lineage (nasab) of the child — and the 'aqīqah serves as an appropriate and fitting means to this end.
Third: Gladdening the hearts of family members, relatives, friends, and the poor by gathering them together over a shared meal. And Allah Almighty knows best.
If the menses lasted for over than 9 to 10 days, considered menstruation?
If the duration of the bleeding does not exceed fifteen days, it is all considered menstruation, even if the usual pattern changes.
Is the one who gives up on marriage because he can`t afford it considered sinful?
Marriage is desirable, but one who can`t afford it isn`t considered sinful. However, he should supplicate to Allah, and seek His forgiveness.