What is the waiting period ('Iddah) for a woman whose husband has passed away, and what is the ruling on her wearing gold?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The waiting period ('Iddah) for a woman whose husband has passed away is four months and ten days for one who is not pregnant. As for a pregnant woman, her waiting period lasts until she gives birth. It is obligatory for her to remain in the marital home, only leaving for a necessity. During this time, it is prohibited (Haram) to display any form of adornment on the body or clothing; this includes wearing kohl, gold, all types of perfume, and dyeing the hair. Likewise, it is prohibited to receive a direct marriage proposal or to marry during this period.
It was narrated by Umm 'Atiyyah that the Prophet ﷺ said: 'We were forbidden to mourn for a deceased person for more than three days, except for a husband, for whom the mourning period is four months and ten days. During this time, we were not to use kohl, nor wear perfume, nor wear dyed clothing except for garments made of 'Asb (coarsely dyed yarn). We were, however, granted a concession at the time of purification—when one of us bathed following her menses—to use a small amount of Kust (costus) or Azfar (fragrant substances). We were also forbidden from following funeral processions.' (Narrated by Al-Bukhari). And Allah the Exalted knows best."
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
What is the due amount of food in expiation for perjury?
It is feeding ten indigent persons: 600 grams (for each) of the average food of your families such as rice, and it is permissible, according to Imam Ahmad Bin Hanbal, to give that amount in money if it was more useful to them.
I`m in love with a certain man, and want to marry him in particular, but my family refused that, what should I do?
The father should know what is in the best interest of his daughter and consider her situation. On her part, the daughter should trust her father`s view point as far as suitors are concerned. Moreover, it is prohibited for any woman, or girl to get involved in a relation with a non-Mahram (Marriageable man).