Is it permissible to repeat the Istikhara (seeking guidance) prayer, and is it a condition that one should sleep after offering it?
All perfect praise be to Allah,The Lord of The Worlds Istikhara is offered once, but it is permissible to repeat it, and sleeping after offering it is not a condition for its validity. And Allah Knows Best.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
If the menses lasted for over than 9 to 10 days, considered menstruation?
If the duration of the bleeding does not exceed fifteen days, it is all considered menstruation, even if the usual pattern changes.
Is it permissible for a woman to swear a false oath by the Holy Quran to please her distrustful husband?
It is forbidden for a person to do so since this is considered a false oath (Yamaan Ghamoos) which dips (Yaghmos) its taker in Hellfire if he/she doesn`t seek repentance, and he/she has to expiate for that oath. You should avoid any doubtful acts so that your husband`s chest remains clear from the evil suggestions of the devil.