I can`t afford to get married, what should I do to curb my sexual drives?
You should offer a lot of voluntary fasting, keep busy with useful and permissible acts and make supplication to Allah, The Exalted.
How should I deal with the whispers of the devil with regard to ablution and purity?
Whispers in ablution are from the devil, and so you should take refuge in Allah from the devil`s evil suggestions that aim to distort the religion. Thus, once an organ is completely pure, don`t question its purity since having whispers doesn`t mean that the purity is invalid as it has already been established.
Is it obligatory for a wife who has been abandoned for many years to observe the waiting period (iddah) after her husband passes away?
If her husband passes away, the wife is required to observe the waiting period (Iddah), even if he had abandoned her, because she is his wife and inherits from him, so she must observe the iddah after his death. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for a person who had vowed to give a certain amount of money to another, but didn`t find the latter to donate that money to the mosque?
In principle, the vowing person should abide by his vow as much as possible. Therefore, if he couldn`t find the person that he had made the vow for, then the vow itself is countless and nothing is due on its maker. However, if the latter happens to find the former later on then, he has to give him that money.