Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Who should pay the Zakah (obligatory charity) from the orphan`s money?
His/her guardian, and if the latter fails to do so, then the orphan himself/herself is obliged to pay the Zakah once he/she reaches puberty, and is capable of handling his/her own affairs. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible to swear by (Allah "The Living")?
Yes, it is permissible because "The Living" is one of Allah`s Attributes.
Is it permissible to give Zakah (obligatory charity) to one`s poor sister, or brother?
It is permissible for one to give the Zakah to his poor sister, or brother if providing for them isn`t due on him, and the sister doesn`t receive sufficient provision from whomever that is due on. And Allah Knows Best.