I can`t afford to get married, what should I do to curb my sexual drives?
You should offer a lot of voluntary fasting, keep busy with useful and permissible acts and make supplication to Allah, The Exalted.
Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.
Is it permissible to swear by (Allah "The Living")?
Yes, it is permissible because "The Living" is one of Allah`s Attributes.
Is it permissible for a person to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) to his daughter-in-law?
Yes, it is permissible for a person to give the Zakah to his daughter-in-law if she was poor, and none provided for particularly by whom are obliged to provide for her. And Allah Knows Best.