What is the ruling on performing istinja' before every ablution?
Istinja' is not from the conditions for the validity of ablution. It is only obligatory for prayer when there is impurity from urine or stool on the private part, or if there is fear of the impurity spreading to the body or clothing. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it valid to perform the obligatory prayer while sitting?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
Standing (Al-Qiyam) while having the ability to do so is one of the pillars (Arkan) of the prayer; the obligatory (Faridah) prayer is not valid without it. However, whoever is unable to stand may pray sitting down. As for voluntary (Nafilah) prayers, it is permissible to pray them sitting even if one is able to stand, but the one sitting receives half the reward of the one who prays standing. And Allah the Exalted knows best.
Is it permissible for women to gather in one of their homes to pray Tarawih?
Yes, it is recommended (mustahabb) for women to pray Tarawih in congregation if they gather, even if it is not in the mosque.
In fact, praying at home is better for them, as it avoids the potential concerns associated with going to the mosque.
If the menses lasted for over than 9 to 10 days, considered menstruation?
If the duration of the bleeding does not exceed fifteen days, it is all considered menstruation, even if the usual pattern changes.