How are those killed in wars punished with the torment of the grave if they are not buried?
The torment of the grave refers to the suffering that the deceased experiences between the day of their death and the Day of Resurrection, which is called the Barzakh period. Similarly, it includes the blessings of the grave, whether the deceased is buried or not. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best
What is the authenticity of the supplication: "O Allah, bring it upon us with blessings and faith, safety and Islam, and success in what You love and are pleased with. My Lord and your Lord is Allah"?
On the authority of Talhah Ibn Ubayd Allah (may Allah be pleased with him) who reported that the Prophet (PBUH) would say when he saw the crescent moon: "O Allah, let this moon appear over us with blessings and faith, safety and Islam. My Lord and your Lord is Allah."
This was narrated by Tirmidhi (Hadith no. 3451), who said: "It is a Hasan (good) Hadith."
And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
What is the ruling on a woman shaking hands with the brothers of her husband`s father, and not putting on Islamic wear before them?
The aforesaid are strangers to the their brother`s son`s wife, therefore, it is forbidden for her to take off her Islamic wear before them, or to shake hands with them.
Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?
No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.