Is the `Iddah (waiting period) of the divorced effective from the time the divorce took place, or from the time of registering it at the court?
It is considered effective from the very moment her divorce took place, but not from the time of registering it at the court. And Allah Knows Best.
What is permissible for the husband to do as far as having sex with his wife is concerned?
The couple are free to enjoy each other sexually provided that they don`t do it during menses. It is also forbidden for the husband to enjoy the wife from her anus.
What husband's stand should be, if his wife disagrees with his mother?
Both the mother and the wife have rights on you (Questioner); therefore, you are obliged to treat both justly, resort to wisdom to please both and intiate reestablishing cordial relations among them. And Allah Knows Best.
I`m a mother of three orphans. Is it permissible for me to spend on myself from their salary, such as buying a Jilbab*?
All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It is permissible to take a reasonable amount that is equal to your services to them. However, it is better that you don`t. The evidence on this is that Almighty Allah Says (What means): "Make trial of orphans until they reach the age of marriage; if then ye find sound judgment in them, release their property to them; but consume it not wastefully, nor in haste against their growing up. If the guardian is well-off, Let him claim no remuneration, but if he is poor, let him have for himself what is just and reasonable. When ye release their property to them, take witnesses in their presence: But all-sufficient is God in taking account." [An-Nisa`/6]. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
* A full-length outer garment, traditionally covering the head and hands, worn in public by some Muslim women.