What are the conditions that must be met for the 'aqīqah to be valid?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The 'aqīqah is like the recommended uḍḥiyyah in terms of the type of animal, its age, and its required characteristics — since it is a recommended slaughter and therefore resembles the uḍḥiyyah in its rulings.
It is agreed upon without any difference of opinion that the 'aqīqah is not valid with any animal other than livestock (al-na'am — camels, cattle, and sheep). Likewise, an animal with a disqualifying defect — such as obvious illness, lameness, or blindness in one eye — does not suffice, as has previously been explained in the rulings of the uḍḥiyyah. And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for the young woman to turn the suitor down if she had no feelings for him?
Yes, it is permissible for her to do so.
What is the ruling on the ablution of one who washes his arms from the wrist to the elbows?
In the school of Imam al-Shafi'i (may Allah have mercy on him), washing the arms (hands) is achieved by washing the arms completely, from the fingertips to the elbows. Washing only the palms at the beginning is insufficient, as washing them at the beginning is a Sunnah, but after washing the face, it becomes obligatory (fard). The person performing ablution must wash his palms along with the arms after washing the face. If he does not wash his palms, his ablution is invalid and not correct. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it valid for the 'aqīqah to be performed using the newborn child's own wealth?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is not permissible for the guardian to perform the 'aqīqah using the newborn child's own wealth, because the 'aqīqah is a voluntary act of giving (tabarru'), and a guardian is prohibited from making voluntary expenditures from the child's wealth. Should he do so, he becomes financially liable for what he spent. And Allah Almighty knows best.