Is it permissible for a woman to sit with her brothers-in-law?
It is impermissible for a woman to sit with her brothers-in-law, and it is also impermissible for a person to have a Khulwa (seclusion) with his sister-in-law.
How is the meat of the 'aqīqah to be distributed?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
If the 'aqīqah is a recommended one (mandūbah), it is obligatory to give some portion of it in charity to the poor — even if the amount is small — with the minimum being approximately half a kilogram of meat.
The most preferable manner of distribution is to divide it into three equal portions, as with the uḍḥiyyah:
One third for the guardian and his household to eat from
One third to be given in charity to the poor
One third to be gifted to friends and neighbours, even if they are wealthy
It is furthermore more preferable to send the food to the poor already cooked, rather than inviting them to come and eat. And Allah Almighty knows best.
What is the ruling on fasting the six days of Shawwal?
Fasting the six days of Shawwal is Sunnah. The Prophet ﷺ said: "Whoever fasts Ramadan and then follows it with six days of Shawwal, it is as if they have fasted for a lifetime." [Narrated by Muslim]
This is because fasting one month of Ramadan is rewarded as fasting for ten months, and the six days are equivalent to sixty days, completing a full year of fasting.
What should the one performing the slaughter say at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah to say the following supplication at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah:
"Bismillāhi wallāhu Akbar, Allāhumma laka wa ilayka, hādhihi 'aqīqatu fulān."
("In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of [the child's name].")
This is based on what al-Bayhaqī narrated in Al-Sunan al-Kubrā (Vol.9/P.511), that the Prophet ﷺ said: "Slaughter it in his name and say: In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of so-and-so."
And Allah Almighty knows best.