Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

I`m a married young man. I fell in love with a widow and proposed to her but her family refused because they feared that this would have an adverse impact on the future of her children. However, we entered into unregistered marriage and told my family and even my wife about it. I`m a person who fears Allah, The Almighty and want to clear myself from any liability before Him, The Exalted. What should I do?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of The Worlds. May His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It is imperative that you proclaim this marriage to preserve rights. Therefore, you must register it in an Islamic court. A second marriage isn`t forbidden, however, if the unregistered marriage had taken place without the consent of the woman`s guardian nor the presence of two honorable witnesses, then it is considered void and your relationship with this woman is forbidden. Therefore, you must conclude a new marriage contract with the approval of her guardian and the presence of two honorable witnesses. We advise you to fear Allah and adhere to the teachings of Sharia in this regard since sinful conduct is that which turns in your heart (making you feel uncomfortable) and you dislike that it would be disclosed to other people. And Allah The Almighy Knows Best.

A person owns sheep or goats and occasionally feeds them from the grass in other people's orchards without the owners’ permission. Is it permissible to eat the meat of these animals if invited to do so? Is it permissible to purchase from these sheep whose owner feed them from people's orchards without their permission, and can one accept gifts from them, such as meat or milk?

 

 

 

Yes, it is permissible because the one who is accountable is their owner, and the cost of the grass on his accountability. In addition, in order to be on the safe side you should abstain from eating his products, because his sheep case is as if they were fed on impurities. And Allah Knows Best.

A woman didn't fufill fasting of the month of Ramadan two years ago, due to pregnancy and breastfeeding, at the time being she is making up the missed Ramadan. What is the ruling of Sharia? And what is due on her? 

Whosoever break the fast during Ramadan or didn't fast at all due to health concerns, is obliged to make up the missed fasts whenever she could so long as making up missed Ramadan didn't extend  to the coming one, and if next one arrived without fulling fasting the missed one, the ransom is 60 grams for each missed day (Equals 60 piasters to one Dinar for each day). And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.  

What is the ruling on having a second congregational prayer in the mosque?

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        It is disliked to have a second congregational prayer in the mosque which isn`t visited by travelers like the neighborhood`s mosque, and which has an appointed Imam, save with the latter`s permission. Nevertheless, if the mosque is visited by travelers, it is permissible to have a second and a third congregational prayer, whether it has an appointed Imam or not, or whether he permits that or not. And Allah Knows Best.