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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

I had my menstrual period at the beginning of Ramadan for six days, then it ended and I became pure. After four days, I started noticing some blood again, which has lasted for two days now, but it is not as heavy as menstrual blood. Is this blood considered menstrual blood, and what is the ruling regarding my prayers, fasting, and reading the Quran during this period?
 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad.
The minimum duration of menstruation is one day and one night, and its maximum is fifteen days. Any blood beyond this period is considered irregular bleeding (Istihada). Since the bleeding did not exceed fifteen days, it is considered menstrual blood within the regular cycle. Therefore, you should not pray or fast until the bleeding stops and the signs of purity appear. If the bleeding stops before fifteen days from when it first started, then all the blood you saw is considered menstrual blood, and you must make up the fasts, but not the prayers. If it exceeds fifteen days, then the first six days are menstrual blood, and the blood that follows is considered irregular bleeding. Your prayers and fasting are valid, and there is no issue with them. And Allah Knows Best."
 
*This answer was updated on [18/5/2023].

Is it incumbent on the fiancée to obey her fiancé?

When the woman settles in her husband`s house, it is incumbent on him to provide for her and it is incumbent on her to obey him. Before that, and if the marriage contract had been concluded, then she is lawfully his wife and thus she should abide by custom in treating him, but if the marriage contract hadn`t been concluded, then she should treat him as a non-Mahram (Marriageable).

What is the ruling on exchanging kisses and hugs between husband and wife during the day in Ramadan?

Praise be to Allah The Lord of The Worlds.

It is disliked to kiss one`s wife during the day in Ramadan, and it is recommended to avoid that. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

1- A young man whose father and grandfather are dead. Unfortuntly, he passedaway leaving a mother, two sisters and a brother. Do his paternal uncles inherit him? 2- A man died leaving daughters, a wife, brothers, a mother or no mother. It is well known that the daughters inherit two thirds and the wife one eighth. To whom does the rest of the estate go and what is the evidence on that from the texts of Sharia?

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
1- The full brother or the paternal half-sibling disinherits the paternal uncles. The paternal half-sibling takes one sixth and because they are from the Asabah (Male relatives on the father`s side) of the deceased they take the rest of the estate. The proof of this is that Ibn ‘Abbas (May Allah Be Pleased with them) reported God’s Messenger (PBUH) as saying: "Give the shares to those who are entitled to them, and what remains over goes to the nearest male heir." [Agreed upon]. In this case, nothing is left to them.
2- The brothers take the rest of the deceased`s estate and the full brother disinherits the paternal half-sibling, and the proof of this is the aforementioned narration. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.