Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible to offer an Udhiyah on behalf of the deceased?

In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Offering an Udhiyah (sacrificial animal) on behalf of a deceased person is permissible. This is the official position of the Hanbali school (as stated in Kashshaf al-Qina’ by al-Bahuti,Vol.6/P.428) and was also upheld by the prominent Shafi'i scholar Al-’Abbadi (mentioned in Bidayat al-Muhtaj by Ibn Qadi Shuhbah,Vol. 4/P.358). It has likewise been narrated as a valid view among some Maliki and Hanafi scholars.
 
In fact, Imam Abu Dawud dedicated an entire chapter in his Sunan collection entitled, "Chapter on Sacrificing on Behalf of the Deceased." In it, he recorded a narration from Hanash, who said: "I saw 'Ali sacrificing two rams, so I asked him, 'What is this?' He replied, 'The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) commanded me to offer a sacrifice on his behalf, so I am sacrificing on his behalf.'"
 
Imam Abu Dawud also narrated from Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "O Allah, this is from You, for You, and on behalf of Muhammad and his Ummah (community). In the Name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest," and he then slaughtered the animal.
 
The textual evidence here lies in the fact that our Master, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), offered a sacrifice on behalf of his entire community—and it is well-established that his community includes those who have already passed away.
 
Furthermore, there is an abundance of sacred texts demonstrating that the rewards of righteous deeds reach the deceased. For instance, it is permissible to fast on behalf of a deceased person who passed away with missed obligatory fasts, and it is equally permissible to perform Hajj on their behalf, both of which are firmly established in authentic Hadiths. Therefore, if the reward of fasting (which is a purely physical act of worship) and Hajj (which is a joint physical and financial act of worship) can reach the deceased, then the reward of an Udhiyah reaches them with greater reason (by way of A Fortiori argument). This is because it is a purely financial act of worship, falling under the general category of charity (Sadaqah).
 
Additionally, scholars have reached a consensus (Ijma') that the rewards of charity reach the deceased, and since the Udhiyah is inherently an act of charity, it falls under the same ruling. Consequently, based on all the aforementioned evidence, we hold the view that offering a sacrifice on behalf of the deceased is entirely permissible. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.

If someone fasts on the White Days with the intention of making up for missed fasts (qada), will they receive the reward for both voluntary and obligatory fasting?

Making up missed obligatory fasts (qada) is mandatory, and the intention for qada must be specified.
If a person makes up their missed Ramadan fasts on the White Days, they must intend qada, but they may also intend to fast the White Days, and Allah willing, they will receive the reward for both.
This is similar to entering a mosque and praying an obligatory prayer, where the person also earns the reward of Tahiyyat al-Masjid (greeting the mosque) if they intend both.
● If the person missed their fasts due to a valid excuse, they may wait and fast on the White Days.
● However, if they missed the fasts without a valid excuse, they must make up the fasts immediately and should not delay them until the White Days.

When is it Sunnah to slaughter the 'aqīqah?

All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah for the 'aqīqah to be slaughtered on the seventh day from the birth of the newborn. According to the sounder position, the day of birth itself is counted as the first of the seven days. Thus, for example, if the child is born on a Saturday, the 'aqīqah is to be slaughtered on the following Friday. If the child is born at night, the count begins from the day that follows. And Allah Almighty knows best.

My brother works in a conventional bank and gave me one of the gifts distributed to bank employees — what is the ruling on accepting it?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
There is no objection to accepting such gifts, because the physical gift itself does not carry any inherent prohibition — unlike stolen property. Sin does not transfer or extend to the one who receives the gift, for Allah the Almighty says {what means}: "And no bearer of burdens shall bear the burden of another." [Al-Anʿām/164]
The evidence for this is that the Prophet ﷺ himself ate from the food of the Jews, conducted transactions with them, and purchased from them — and it is well known that their wealth was intermingled with ribā. Similarly, the wealth of conventional ribā-based banks is a mixture of the lawful and the unlawful.
Ibn Ḥajar al-Haytamī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "It is not forbidden to transact with one whose wealth is predominantly unlawful, nor to eat from it — as al-Nawawī affirmed in al-Majmūʿ." [Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj, Vol. 9/P.389] And Allah the Almighty knows best.