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Dealing with Family Violence and Methods of Preventing it
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-02-2022

Dealing with Family Violence and Methods of Preventing it

 

 

Family violence (also called domestic violence) has caused societal, economic, psychological, health-related issues since psychological complexes resulting from this type of violence usually develop into aggravated medical conditions, aggressive or criminal behavior, and those subjected to such violence are likely to inflict it on others. Loosening of family ties, lack of trust and insecurity may lead to the vanishing of the family altogether since it is the nucleus of society and any threat it faces-through this violence - will eventually lead to undermining society as a whole.

 

Therefore, among the key solutions for the phenomenon of family violence is compliance with the provisions of Islamic Sharia, adopting its teachings, and applying them in family life. This is starts from the moment of searching for a life partner, having children, and raising them in a certain manner. Actually, Islam isn`t limited to performing acts of worship; rather, it is a way of life. Consequently, it is necessary to clarify the purpose of Sharia behind the verses and prophetic narrations in which "beating" was mentioned to prevent misusing them in the name of Islam.

 

Being the nucleus in the upbringing process and providing its members with the correct behavior, the family has shouldered huge responsibilities in different areas in a bid to protect its members from this violence. Some of these responsibilities are:

 

  • Adopting informed dialogue amongst its members.
  • Treating children equally and satisfying their psychological, social, material, and behavioral needs.
  • Participating with children on the moral and physical levels through becoming best friends in order to instil confidence in their hearts.
  • Minimizing TV shows showing violent content through instilling principles and morality in them from an early age.
  • Following up on their academic progress and developing their creative skills and hidden talents.
  • Enhancing love of country and society.
  • Living with each other in kindness and equity.
  • Putting an end to the phenomenon of divorce.

 

Moreover, media plays a pivotal role in guiding and correcting behavior. This role crystallizes in allocating media channels to help the family overcome domestic violence and utilizing commercial breaks to broadcast awareness-raising messages. This is in addition to disseminating the culture of respect for the opposite sex, acquainting men with the rights of women, training the family on addressing problems along with raising mothers` awareness - through targeted programs-about age and stages of child`s development. Also, uncovering the reasons leading to this violence, preventing it, and highlighting this phenomenon through citation of evidence. Moreover, raising awareness of family about the adverse psychological and social effects of violence on both the individual and society. Further, printing and publishing booklets clarifying the psychological effect of this violence on the children.

 

The role of school is no longer limited to teaching since we live in an era that enabled man to learn through utilizing various means of communication. Accordingly, school must play a leading role in educating the community and guiding the behavior of its members via different programs that it prepares and projects that it adopts. School can help prevent domestic violence through raising the awareness of mothers and fathers. This can be achieved by addressing societal issues and finding the effective solutions, combating unusual behavior, emphasizing the importance of volunteerism, in addition to making voluntary contributions.

 

Raising awareness on the religious, social, intellectual, cultural, and legal levels, in addition to acquainting members of society with their rights and duties, is amongst the best means to end this phenomenon. However, this has to come in different forms, such as training, workshops, rehabilitation, lectures, booklets, brochures, conferences, seminars; utilizing all available means like media organizations as well as government and non-government institutions.

 

In this context, we stress the role undertaken by male and female spiritual guides and mosque preachers in terms of raising awareness and offering advice and guidance; particularly since our society is influenced by religious guidance and discourse, which are based on clear principles of Sharia.

 

Some of the key solutions that actively participate in curbing domestic violence are:

 

  • Offering the necessary advice and guidance to protect society from domestic violence.
  • Providing psychological, social, and familial counselling to members of families suffering from domestic violence.
  • Establishing a connection between the victims of domestic violence and the available counselling organizations through providing hotlines, which enable the latter to give assistance if needed.
  • Providing secure places for women and children to make them feel safe, even temporarily, and to enable specialists to provide the necessary assistance.
  • Teaching women and children to develop security plans inside and outside home.
  • Cooperating with family and children organizations to find solutions that suit each individual family.
  • Training children to have non-violent reactions to blow off some steam considering the violence they have been subjected to.
  • Teaching positive behavior to children to enable them control anger and negative emotions to help them form sound and safe relationships in the future.

And all praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds.

 

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on a Friday sermon in which the khaṭīb did not explicitly exhort the congregation to be conscious of Allah (taqwā) in both sermons, but sufficed with commanding them to obey Allah and refrain from disobeying Him?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
For the Friday sermon (khuṭbat al-Jumʿah) to be valid, certain essential pillars (arkān) must be fulfilled. Among these is the exhortation to be conscious of Allah (waṣiyyah bi-taqwā Allāh), which must be present in both sermons. Alongside this pillar, the praising of Allah (ḥamdallah) and the sending of blessings upon the Messenger of Allah ﷺ are equally required.
Shaykh al-Islām Imām Ibn Ḥajar al-Haytamī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "These three are pillars in each of the two sermons, because each sermon is independent and separate from the other." [Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj,Vol.4/P.447]
It is not a condition that the exhortation be expressed in any specific wording, nor is it required that the word "taqwā" itself be used — such as saying "I exhort you to be conscious of Allah." Rather, this pillar is fulfilled by any expression that contains a command to obey Allah the Almighty and to abstain from what He has prohibited.
Imām al-Khaṭīb al-Sharbīnī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "The third pillar is the exhortation to taqwā... The specific wording of this exhortation is not required, according to the most correct view, because the purpose is admonition and the urging of obedience to Allah the Almighty. Therefore, any expression that conveys admonition suffices — whether long or short — such as: 'Obey Allah and be ever mindful of Him.'" [Mughnī al-Muḥtāj,Vol.1/P.550]
Accordingly, what the khaṭīb has done — by commanding obedience to Allah and forbidding disobedience to Him in both sermons — is valid and sufficient. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

My husband discloses all our marital disputes to his family. What is the ruling of Islamic Law on this?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is impermissible to divulge spousal secrets or expose one another's faults, whether during the subsistence of the marriage or after its dissolution. The foundational principle governing marital relations is that it is built upon confidentiality and mutual affection. Divulging marital secrets constitutes a breach of trust and a grave sin.
 
A husband ought not to resort to his family to complain about his wife over every dispute, nor is the reverse permissible for the wife, especially when such actions lead to stirring up malice and animosity between the spouses or between their respective families.
 
Islam has enjoined the preservation of secrets in general and commanded against revealing them; safeguarding the privacy of the home holds an even greater priority. And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on performing the Witr prayer as a single rak`ah?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is permissible to perform the Witr prayer as a single unit (rak‘ah). It was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar that a man asked the Messenger of Allah ﷺ about the night prayer, and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ replied: 'The night prayer is offered two by two (mathna mathna). If one of you fears the approach of dawn, let him pray a single rak‘ah to make what he has prayed odd-numbered (Witr) for him.' (Related by al-Bukhari & Muslim)). However, limiting the prayer to only one rak‘ah is considered 'contrary to the preferred way' (Khilaf al-Awla).
 
It is stated in Al-Minhaj al-Qawim Sharh al-Muqaddimah al-Hadramiyyah (p. 137): 'The minimum of Witr is one rak‘ah, but limiting it to that is contrary to what is best.'
 
The most complete form of Witr is eleven units, while the minimum level of 'perfection' is three units. It is stated in ‘Umdat al-Salik (p. 60): 'The minimum of Witr is one rak‘ah, and its maximum is eleven, performing the taslim (salutation) after every two units. The lowest level of perfection is three units with two separate taslims (meaning 2+1).' And Allah the Exalted knows best.

My father has debts and asked me to repay them years ago, and I promised him I would do so upon his death — is it permissible for me to go back on my promise given that I am unable to repay them, especially since he refuses to contribute to repayment on the grounds that the debt has become my responsibility by virtue of my promise?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The established principle is that a father's debt is to be repaid from his own wealth, if he possesses sufficient means. As for the promise made by the son to repay it on his father's behalf, fulfilling such a promise is strongly recommended, and breaking it is considerably disliked. Shaykh al-Islām Imām al-Nawawī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "Fulfilling a promise is emphatically recommended, and breaking it is severely disliked. The evidences for this from the Qurʾān and the Sunnah are well known." [Rawḍat al-Ṭālibīn,Vol. 2/P.278] Shaykh al-Islām Imām Zakariyyā al-Anṣārī, may Allah have mercy upon him, further states: "The reason fulfilling a promise is not obligatory and breaking it is not forbidden is that a promise is in the nature of a gift, and a gift does not become binding except upon receipt." [Asnā al-Maṭālib fī Sharḥ Rawḍ al-Ṭālib,Vol. 2/P.487]
Given that the son does not possess the financial means to fulfil his promise to his father, breaking this promise falls beyond his capacity — and Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear. Since the father himself possesses sufficient wealth to settle his own debt, repayment must be made from his own funds. Should he pass away before doing so, the debt is to be settled from his estate. And Allah the Almighty knows best.