Is it permissible for a wife to leave her house without asking her husband?
It is impermissible for the wife to leave her house without asking her husband except for a sound reason.
Is performing Umrah an obligation for who is capable. Is he accountable for not performing it in this case?
Umrah is an obligation once in a lifetime for every Muslim. When physical and financial ability is present, it is preferable to perform Umrah, as well as Hajj. If one can afford to perform Umrah but not Hajj, then they should begin with Umrah, especially since Hajj nowadays is not accessible to everyone who wishes to perform it. In contrast, Umrah is more open and easier to undertake. And Allah knows best.
What is permissible for the husband to do as far as having sex with his wife is concerned?
The couple are free to enjoy each other sexually provided that they don`t do it during menses. It is also forbidden for the husband to enjoy the wife from her anus.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.