When Iddah is Initiated for Deceased's Wife?

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His Peace and Blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.

Iddah is observed on the same date at which her husband passed away for four months, but as for the pregnant, it is observed at the date she gives birth. And Allah Knows Best. 

Is it permissible for a pious Muslim woman to stay with her husband who had quit praying out of laziness?

Quitting prayer is one of the major grave sins that come after disbelieving in Allah, but the wife of such a person isn`t considered divorced, rather, she should exert all her efforts in order to bring him back to the way of Islam. However, if his sin is likely to lure her from the way of Islam, then she had better separate from him by lawful means such as Mokhal`aa (When a wife pays a compensation for her husband in return for divorcing her). Moreover, if she exercises patience, and remains steadfast on her faith, then there is no harm in doing that.

Is it permissible for the wife to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) of her money to her poor husband?

Yes, it is permissible for the wife to give from the Zakah of her money to her poor husband. And Allah Knows Best.

How should a person who is afflicted with continued major ritual impurity (incontinence of urine, bleeding outside the monthly period) perform ablution?

Such a person should make ablution for every prayer after its due time and after removing impurities from their body and outfit, and should place a fresh diaper whenever needed so as for the impurity not to spread out. They should also perform prayer immediately even if incontinence of urine continued, and should repeat the aforementioned for every obligatory prayer, then perform optional prayer as much as they want.