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Family`s Role in Countering Extremism
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 16-01-2023

 

 

Family`s Role in Countering Extremism

 

 

The family is the first line of defense that prevents its members from falling as victims for extremism and perversion. It also corrects behavior, builds values and morals, leads minds and thoughts, and teaches the children what is right, wrong, lawful, and unlawful.

Despite the growing role of media and educational institutions in modern societies, the institution of the family has the biggest impact on human life in terms of the intellect, morals and practices. However, the mission of the family remains linked to how much it achieves the foundations of sound education derived from the magnanimous message of Islam, which protects our children against causes of perversion and provides them with the ability to counter factors of corruption and extremism.

As a concept, extremism is tied with exaggeration, strictness, and ignoring the right course of action in understanding issues whether with regards to religion or worldly matters. In fact, the concept of extremism isn`t limited to the calls for violence, hatred, Takfir (Accusing Muslims with disbelief) and sectarian militarization; rather, it extends to calls for division, discrimination, and exclusion based on religious or political grounds. This deepens the tendency towards conflicting with the other, destroys the social fabric, and hinders the building of human relationships on basis of equal rights and duties.

In Islam, family education keeps members of society away from extremism and exaggeration. Rather, it creates an integrated and balanced personality since the family is primarily responsible for the formation of an individual`s true character as well as morals. Proper education is the outcome of love, mercy, mutual respect between spouses, and parents` sense of duty and responsibility as regards the greatness of the task ahead.

Undoubtedly, the family that is broken and far removed from the values of Islam can produce various forms of extremism, behavioral, psychological, and intellectual deviation. The children-deprived from love, sound moral guidance, steered not to accept others, immersed in selfishness and self-love, and adopt perverted notions about the issues of Islam-are more susceptible than others to become perverted and extremists. This is because they feel marginalized, detached from society, and skeptic about society and its higher values.

The Islamic family education is the best education that establishes a collaborative and cohesive society. In addition, adherence to the principles and guidelines advocated by Islam represent the optimal method to confront and defeat extremism, and this is reflected in the following educational aspects:

1- Maximizing Human Worth.

The Noble Quran confirms that the value of a human being lies in his/her humanity, not in his/her ethnic, religious or cultural affiliations. Almighty Allah Says {What means}: "We have honoured the sons of Adam; provided them with transport on land and sea; given them for sustenance things good and pure; and conferred on them special favours, above a great part of our creation." {Al-Isra`/70}.

2- Building Psychological Balance.

If the sense of injustice and persecution represent an essential trait in the building of the extreme personality, which suffers from persecution complex, then the good family upbringing must be based on psychological balance and not to be dragged behind the sense of injustice because it leads to spreading hatred and the desire for revenge.

3- Building Objective Thinking.

The family education encompasses moral, behavioral as well as intellectual aspects. This is since a child learns from its parents ways of thinking along with forms of behavior, consciously or unconsciously; directly or indirectly.

Some forms of objective thinking are:

A- Not generalizing judgments, be that in religious, moral or political issues.

B- Teaching children the scientific method in explaining social phenomena and that there are reasons behind them that can be grasped by the human mind, and that this doesn`t go against believing in Allah. However, it is a religious duty in addition to being a human necessity that elevates human societies.

4- Building the Right Conscious Concepts.

Misconceptions are key factors for extremism; namely when it comes to the concepts of (Loyalty and disavowal, governance, innovation, and other). This conceptual flaw leads to the inability to draw a distinction between religion as a set of theoretical principles and sacred texts and religiosity as a way of understanding and application practiced by an individual in reality. This is reflected in understanding the discrepancy between what is attributed to Islam from amongst the practices that go against its values and morals and Islam itself. This helps the younger generation to reject extreme practices attributed to Islam and impede being dragged behind extremist movements. It also impedes having doubts about the values and the humanity of Islam when love and mercy are the cornerstone and aim of family education. This will also be reflected on the methods and styles of education and will be anti-extremism.

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the correct point at which to raise the hands when standing up for the third rak‘ah (after the middle tashahhud)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Raising the hands while saying the takbīr [when rising for the third rak‘ah] is a recommended sunnah, and omitting it does not affect the validity of the prayer. The proper time for this is after rising from the middle tashahhud, once one has fully stood up.
It is stated in I‘ānat aṭ-Ṭālibīn (Vol.1/P.158): "His statement, 'and rising from the first tashahhud' — meaning, this manner [of raising the hands] is also a sunnah when he rises from the first tashahhud, that is, when he stands upright from it.
Consider [the question]: when precisely does the raising of the hands begin? Is it at the very start of rising from the first tashahhud, or after he has reached the minimum position of rukū‘ [i.e., once fully upright]? The apparent, [correct] view is the latter — even though the outward wording [of the text] might suggest the former — because at the very start of his rising, he is still relying on both hands [to push himself up, and therefore cannot yet raise them]."
It is stated in ‘Umdat as-Sālik (p. 53): "If his prayer extends beyond two rak‘ahs, he sits after them in the iftirāsh position, recites the tashahhud, and sends blessings upon the Prophet ﷺ alone, without [mentioning] his family [at this point]. He then stands while saying the takbīr, supporting himself with his hands; and once he has stood upright, he raises them level with his shoulders." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the wisdom behind legislating the Udhiyah?

The Muslim must know that through the Uḍḥiyah, he complies with the command of Allah, the Exalted, and performs a worship that brings him closer to Allah and distances him from the Fire.
 
The Uḍḥiyah holds profound wisdoms and noble meanings, including:
 
1-Reviving the Sunnah of Abraham, peace be upon him: He complied with Allah's command when He ordered him to slaughter his son Ishmael. Abraham, peace be upon him, succeeded in the test, and when he was about to slaughter his son, Allah sent down a ram to ransom Ishmael and commanded him to slaughter it instead. Allah, the Exalted, says {what means]: "And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, 'O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think.' He said, 'O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast.' And when they had both submitted and he put him down upon his forehead, We called to him, 'O Abraham, You have fulfilled the vision.' Indeed, We thus reward the doers of good. Indeed, this was the clear trial. And We ransomed him with a great sacrifice." [Al-Ṣāffāt/102-107]. Thus, the sacrificial offering became an enduring Sunnah until the Day of Judgment, and Muslims offer their wealth as sacrifices, drawing closer to Allah, the Exalted, reviving this great Sunnah.
 
2-Providing abundance for people on Eid day and the Days of Tashrīq: Among the wisdoms of the Uḍḥiyah is that the Muslim provides generously for his family, neighbors, relatives, and the poor during these days. The Muslim is encouraged to eat from his sacrifice, give charity from it to the poor, and gift from it to his wealthy neighbors. Thus, goodness spreads throughout the entire community. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "The Days of Tashrīq are days of eating and drinking." (Narrated by Muslim). Allah, the Exalted, says {what means}: "And the camels and cattle We have appointed for you as among the symbols of Allah; for you therein is good." [Al-Ḥajj/36]. This good includes the good of both this world and the Hereafter.

For some time I have been searching for a guiding shaykh to teach me the spiritual path (*sulūk*) and the Islamic sciences, but I have not found one. What should I do?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
There is abundant good in this Ummah, and the scholars who guide and nurture are never cut off. The student of knowledge should strive in seeking them out, ask diligently after them, and draw from their learning.
As for one who cannot find a guiding and nurturing shaykh, he should send abundant prayers and peace upon our master the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), while keeping constantly to dhikr and worship and abstaining from the forbidden. For that will bring him to his goal in traveling toward Allah the Exalted. Imam Muḥammad al-Sanūsī (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “I have seen it said by some of the imams of Sufism that whoever lacks shaykhs of spiritual training (shuyūkh al-tarbiyah) should increase his invocation of blessings upon the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), for by it he will reach his goal.”
The scholar Aḥmad Zarrūq al-Mālikī (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Qawāʿid al-Taṣawwuf (p. 86), rule no. 114: “Dhikr is the decree of sainthood (manshūr al-wilāyah). Whoever is given dhikr has been given the decree. Our shaykh Abū al-ʿAbbās al-Ḥaḍramī (may Allah be pleased with him) said: ‘Keep constantly to dhikr and abundant blessings upon the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), for it is a ladder, an ascent, and a path to Allah the Exalted when the seeker does not meet a guiding shaykh.’” And Allah Almighty knows best.

My father has debts and asked me to repay them years ago, and I promised him I would do so upon his death — is it permissible for me to go back on my promise given that I am unable to repay them, especially since he refuses to contribute to repayment on the grounds that the debt has become my responsibility by virtue of my promise?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The established principle is that a father's debt is to be repaid from his own wealth, if he possesses sufficient means. As for the promise made by the son to repay it on his father's behalf, fulfilling such a promise is strongly recommended, and breaking it is considerably disliked. Shaykh al-Islām Imām al-Nawawī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "Fulfilling a promise is emphatically recommended, and breaking it is severely disliked. The evidences for this from the Qurʾān and the Sunnah are well known." [Rawḍat al-Ṭālibīn,Vol. 2/P.278] Shaykh al-Islām Imām Zakariyyā al-Anṣārī, may Allah have mercy upon him, further states: "The reason fulfilling a promise is not obligatory and breaking it is not forbidden is that a promise is in the nature of a gift, and a gift does not become binding except upon receipt." [Asnā al-Maṭālib fī Sharḥ Rawḍ al-Ṭālib,Vol. 2/P.487]
Given that the son does not possess the financial means to fulfil his promise to his father, breaking this promise falls beyond his capacity — and Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear. Since the father himself possesses sufficient wealth to settle his own debt, repayment must be made from his own funds. Should he pass away before doing so, the debt is to be settled from his estate. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

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