Articles

Threats and Challenges Facing the Family
Author : Dr. Ahmad al-Harasees
Date Added : 12-01-2023

Threats and Challenges Facing the Family

"Failure to Shoulder the Responsibility of Upbringing"

 

The family is the essential building block of society in the sense that it is the children`s first cultural, educational, and environmental vessel. The family consists of a group of individuals related by bloodline. It also holds society together and plays a key role in building a righteous, integrated, and closely knitted society in which love, cooperation, national unity, and security prevail. Moreover, the family is built on love, mercy, and dwelling in tranquility; as reflected in the following verse: " And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect." {Ar-Rum/21}. 

One of the most important challenges facing the family nowadays is failure to shoulder the responsibility of upbringing, and this can be attributed to ignorance or negligence.

One of the major threats to the family is parents' failure to perform the responsibility of upbringing their children. This is despite the fact the Allah mentioned this responsibility in the Quran and tied it with children`s obedience and dutifulness to parents. He The Almighty Says {What means}: "Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: "My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood." {Al-Isra`/23-24}.

The importance of this responsibility is clearly reflected in the Prophetic tradition. Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported:

The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects."

[Agreed upon].

Every person has certain responsibilities and will be held to account for them before Almighty Allah. It is worth pointing that fulfilling duties towards one`s dependents will be to his/her  benefit, in the first place, and that of society, in addition to receiving a reward for that from Allah. Conversely, failure to do so will have negative repercussions on society and being subjected to severe punishment from Allah. This is why the Prophet (PBUH) directs his nation to fulfill its duties in the best manner possible and guides to that, which is best for it with regards to religious and worldly interests.

In addition, a baby is born with a pure and sound hearts, so we must teach it the sound Aqida (Islamic creed) and arm it with piety and righteousness to achieve a sublime and strong society.

The responsibility of the man according to the above Hadith is achieved through raising his children and educating them, which requires keeping them far from suspicious matters, in addition to providing them with life essentials, such as clothes, food, and accommodation, but with moderation. He must also take care of them, do what is in their best interest and treat them justly. "Indeed, Allah Will Question everyone who is responsible about his charge."

As for the woman`s responsibility according to the same Hadith, it is reflected in serving her husband, raising his children to be righteous members of society, dealing with them patiently at times of hardship, managing their affairs, in addition to preserving her husband`s wealth.

Through inquiry and considering the situation of the families, we can summaries the educational methods as follows:

1- Authoritarian parenting style. This is the traditional method in which the parents control the personality of their children by imposing orders and setting up rules not up for discussion. They bear down heavily upon their children to control their behavior. This style makes the children lose self-confidence, rely heavily on their parents, don`t think on their own, and seek parent`s approval for every step they take. However, a gap may appear between the parents and their children as the latter grow older. This is to the level that the children become overwhelmed with the desire to get rid of their parent`s domination to enjoy their independent personalities.

2- Free-range parenting style. This is an easy method in which the parents don`t insist on certain rules of behavior, so there are no limits or controls. This style involves a great deal of freedom, but little order and guidance. This causes the children to become rebellious and disobedient, not governed by order or rules and tend to be impulsive. In addition, when they become teenagers, they tend to commit shameful practices, such as taking drugs. 

3- Balanced parenting style and its effect on the children. This method is a combination of the two previous methods of parenting; however, their negative aspects are avoided while the positives are highlighted. This method focuses on the child and developing his/her capacities, which means supporting the child`s independence within reasonable limits. Moreover, it must be stressed that marriage is a commitment that requires ability and competence, and here we don`t mean material capacity alone; rather, the capacity to maintain the marital relationship and find a balance of give and take, rights, and obligations; all of which emanates from responsibility.

 

 

 

 

Article Number [ Previous | Next ]

Read for Author




Comments


Captcha


Warning: this window is not dedicated to receive religious questions, but to comment on topics published for the benefit of the site administrators—and not for publication. We are pleased to receive religious questions in the section "Send Your Question". So we apologize to readers for not answering any questions through this window of "Comments" for the sake of work organization. Thank you.




Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible for a person to give the Zakah(obligatory charity) to his daughter-in-law?

Yes, it is permissible for a person to give the Zakah to his daughter-in-law if she was poor, and wasn`t provided for sufficiently by whomever is obliged to provide for her.

If the Prophet (PBUH) was an Arab citizen in 2009, born in an Arab country ruled by an Arab ruler, saw what was happening to Gaza, what would he (PBUH) have done?

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.
Had the Prophet (PBUH) been amongst us, Muslims would have supported him, and then he would do whatever pleases the heart of every Muslim. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

Has Islam made it incumbent on us to give our children particular names?

No, it hasn`t, but it is desirable that we give them good names.

1-A young man whose father and grandfather are dead has died leaving a mother, two sisters and a brother. Do his paternal uncles inherit him?2- A man died leaving daughters, a wife, brothers, a mother or no mother. It is well known that the daughters inherit two thirds and the wife one eighth. To whom does the rest of the estate go and what is the evidence on that from the texts of Sharia?

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
1- The full brother or the paternal half-sibling disinherits the paternal uncles. The paternal half-sibling takes one sixth and because they are from the Asabah (Male relatives on the father`s side) of the deceased they take the rest of the estate. The proof of this is that Ibn ‘Abbas (May Allah Be Pleased with them) reported God’s Messenger as saying: "Give the shares to those who are entitled to them, and what remains over goes to the nearest male heir." [Agreed upon]. In this case, nothing is left to them.
2- The brothers take the rest of the deceased`s estate and the full brother disinherits the paternal half-sibling, and the proof of this is the aforementioned narration. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.