Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?
No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Is it permissible for a Muslim to escort his deceased disbelieving relative to his final resting place?
It is permissible provided that he doesn`t walk behind non-Islamic symbols, rather he should walk in front of them.
Is it permissible for a wife`s family to demand her husband to divorce her although she doesn`t want that?
It is forbidden for them to do that in case their daughter doesn`t want divorce unless there was a sin that continues as long as the marriage survives.