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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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All Perfect Praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His Peace and Blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Extending thanks to Allah for His grace, expressing happiness for having a newborn, declaring lineage, and feeding the mother to compensate for the blood that she had lost during delivery.

What is the ruling on discharges two or three days before the expected period of menstruation and the light-colored blood accompanying it? Must the woman abstain from prayer during this period?

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A group of about thirty young men will go to a farm on Friday. Is it permissible for one of us to deliver the sermon (*khuṭbah*) and lead us in the Friday prayer, or is it necessary to go to the nearest mosque?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The Friday prayer (Jumuʿah) is not obligatory upon a traveler, whether his journey is long or short, if he leaves his place of residence before the time of Fajr begins, according to the Shāfiʿī school. If, however, he sets out on his journey after the Fajr adhān, then he is obliged to perform the Friday prayer, whether in his own town or in any town where the Friday prayer is held.
It is stated in Bushrā al-Karīm (Vol.1/p.383), one of the books of the Shāfiʿī school: “[The Friday prayer] is not obligatory upon a traveler on a permissible journey, whether long or short, if he departs from his place of residence before dawn.” End quote.
Accordingly, if you set out on your journey after Fajr, you are obliged to perform the Friday prayer in the mosque. The same applies if you set out after that, since you would not have fulfilled the conditions for the validity of the Friday prayer, among them: that it be attended by forty men who are free, adult (bāligh), sane, and settled residents of the place where Friday is held. It must be held within a cluster of connected buildings, whether a city, a village, or a district (liwāʾ), for what counts is the gathering of the buildings. And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on a woman who learns of her divorce or her husband's death after her *ʿiddah* has ended? And does the *ʿiddah* of a woman who abandoned mourning (*iḥdād*) for the whole period of the *ʿiddah*, or part of it, still end, even though she knew that abandoning it is forbidden?**

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
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If her ʿiddah ends before she learns of her husband’s death, or of his divorcing her, she does not observe the ʿiddah upon learning of it, because her ʿiddah has already ended.
It is stated in al-Bayān fī Madhhab al-Imām al-Shāfiʿī (Vol.11/p.41), one of the books of the Shāfiʿī school: “If a man divorces his wife, or dies while he is absent from her, her ʿiddah is from the time of the divorce or from the time of death. If she does not know of the divorce or the death until her ʿiddah period has ended, then her ʿiddah has ended. If she learns of it before the end of the ʿiddah period, she completes her ʿiddah counting from the time of the divorce or death.”
As for a woman who abandoned mourning throughout the ʿiddah while knowing that it is forbidden, she is sinful, although her ʿiddah has nonetheless ended. And Allah Almighty knows best.