Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling of Islam on swearing by Allah without intending to take an actual oath?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
If someone swears by Allah without intending to take an actual oath, and without the firm resolve to bind themselves to it, then there is no sin or expiation (Kaffarah) required of them. Allah the Exalted says {what means}: 'God will not call you to account for thoughtlessness in your oaths, but for the intention in your hearts; and He is Oft-forgiving, Most Forbearing.' [Al-Baqarah/225]. However, a Muslim should avoid swearing oaths excessively so that their tongue does not become accustomed to it. Allah the Exalted says {what means}: 'And make not God’s (name) an excuse in your oaths against doing good, or acting rightly, or making peace between persons; for God is One Who heareth and knoweth all things.
' [Al-Baqarah/224]. And Allah the Exalted knows best."

I own a pharmacy and have only merchandise. A full year (*ḥawl*) has passed and I have no cash. How do I pay the zakāh?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
Zakāh must be paid immediately from the day it becomes due, and delaying it is forbidden when one is able to pay it, because it is the right of the poor, and it is forbidden to delay giving people their rights except for a valid Sharīʿah excuse. Shaykh al-Islām Imam al-Nawawī (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “In our school, zakāh must be paid out immediately. Once it becomes due and he is able to pay it, it is not permissible to delay it. If he is unable, he may delay it until he is able. If he delays it after being able, he is disobedient and becomes liable for it.” [al-Majmūʿ Sharḥ al-Muhadhdhab, Vol.5/p.333]
If cash is not available to pay the zakāh and the only option is to pay in installments, he must pay it, even if in installments, from the proceeds of the merchandise that is sold after the time the zakāh became due, by deducting a set amount from each day’s takings. And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on one who vowed not to speak to a certain person, then forgot his vow and spoke to him?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
Whoever swears an oath or makes a vow to abstain from something has a choice: if he wishes, he may keep to his vow, or if he wishes, he may offer the expiation of an oath (kaffārat yamīn). The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “The expiation for a vow is the expiation for an oath.” Narrated by Muslim. This type of vow is called a nadhr al-lajāj (a vow made in stubbornness or anger).
If a person makes a vow and then forgets it, nothing is due from him, for forgetfulness is among the excuses that lift legal responsibility (taklīf) from a Muslim. This is based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): “Actions are judged only by intentions, and every person will have only what he intended.” [Narrated by al-Bukhārī]. There is no intention for the one who forgets or errs. It is also based on the report: “Indeed, Allah has pardoned for my Ummah mistakes, forgetfulness, and what they are compelled to do.” Narrated by Ibn Mājah and others, and graded authentic by Ibn Ḥibbān and al-Ḥākim.
It is stated in ʿUmdat al-Sālik (p. 243), one of the books of the Shāfiʿī school: “Whoever swears, [for example], ‘I will not enter the house,’ and then enters it forgetfully, ignorantly, under compulsion, or being carried, he does not break his oath.” And Allah Almighty knows best.

If someone regularly fasts the six days of Shawwal, are they obligated to fast them every year?

A person is not obligated to fast the six days of Shawwal every year, even if they have made it a habit. However, someone who regularly performs a good deed should not abandon it as long as they are able.