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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

Does the use of suppositories, enemas, or hemorrhoid creams affect the validity of fasting?

Enemas and suppositories inserted through either of the two private passages invalidate the fast. This ruling is based on the statement of Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him): "Breaking the fast occurs from what enters (the body), not from what exits." [Reported by Al-Bayhaqi in As-Sunan Al-Kubra]
His generalization regarding anything entering the body indicates that it invalidates fasting, whether it is nutritious or not, as even non-nutritious substances resemble food in form.
It is recommended to use them before Fajr or after Iftar. However, if a person must use them while fasting, they should continue refraining from food and drink for the rest of the day and make up for that day later.

Does sacrificing one sheep avail for the entire household?

In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Offering an Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) is a communal Sunnah (Sunnah Kifayah) for members of the same household, provided that their financial maintenance is undertaken by a single provider. By "communal Sunnah," we mean that when one person performs it, the religious recommendation is fulfilled on behalf of the entire household, though the spiritual reward itself belongs uniquely to the one who offered it.
 
Therefore, if any member of the household performs the sacrifice—even if it is someone who is not legally responsible for the household's expenses, such as the wife or one of the children—the recommendation is fulfilled for everyone in that home. However, the reward does not automatically extend to the other members unless the person offering the sacrifice explicitly intends to share the reward with them—similar to how performing a funeral prayer (Janazah) fulfills the communal obligation for everyone, yet the specific reward is earned by those who actually prayed.
 
Additionally, a single sacrifice is sufficient for a man who is married to more than one wife. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.

Is it permissible to appoint a proxy for the sacrificial offering outside Jordan?

In the name of Allah; all praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is permissible to appoint a proxy—whether an individual or a charitable organization—to perform the sacrificial slaughter (Udhiyah) on one’s behalf, even if it is carried out in a country other than that of the donor. This is conditional upon the proxy’s adherence to the established requirements of the Udhiyah, including the animal’s age, its freedom from physical defects, the designated timing of the slaughter, and the proper distribution of the meat.
However, it is preferable for the one offering the sacrifice to perform the slaughter personally, in order to attain the full reward and blessings of the act. And Allah (Exalted be He) knows best.

Should a prayer performer who forgets to offer the middle Tashahod (saying ash-hadu anala ilaha ila-alah) offer Sujood As-Sahw (prostration of forgetfulness)?

He/she should offer two prostrations of forgetfulness at the end of the prayer. And Allah Knows Best.