Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on someone who curses the religion or commits an act of disbelief during the day in Ramadan?

Whoever apostatizes (leaves Islam) while fasting, their fast is invalid. Cursing the religion is an act of apostasy (may Allah protect us from it). Such a person must return to Islam by pronouncing the Shahadah (testimony of faith), seek Allah’s forgiveness, refrain from eating and drinking for the rest of the day, and make up for that day’s fast later.

What is the ruling on having an intention (Niyyah) for every prayer?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Intention (Niyyah) is a pillar (Rukn) without which the prayer is not valid. The worshiper must have an intention for every prayer, meaning they must consciously intend the act of worship they are performing. Its timing must coincide with the opening Takbir (Takbirat al-Ihram). It is not a requirement to utter it verbally; rather, doing so is considered a recommended Sunnah. There are three levels of intention:
 
1-If the prayer is obligatory (Fard): It is mandatory to include the Intent (to pray), the Specification (which prayer, e.g., 'Asr), and the Obligation (recognizing it as a Fard). For example, one should bring to mind or say: 'I intend to pray the Fard of 'Asr.'
 
2-If it is a voluntary prayer restricted by a specific time or cause (Sunnah Muqayyadah): It is mandatory to include the Intent and the Specification. For example: 'I intend to pray the Sunnah before Zuhr' or 'I intend to pray Duha.'
 
3-If it is an absolute voluntary prayer (Nafl Mutlaq): It is sufficient to simply have the Intent to pray. For example: 'I intend to pray.'
 
And Allah the Exalted knows best.

Is it permissible for a woman who has become pure before the end of forty days of confinement to perform different acts of worship? and is it lawful for her husband to have sex with her?

Once postpartum bleeding ceases and she is certain that it won`t happen again, she becomes pure, and so she should perform Ghusl (ritual bath), pray, and fast. She can also have sex with her husband even before the end of (40) days because the minimum of postpartum bleeding is a moment, and the maximum is (60) days. However, the postpartum bleeding for the majority of women is (40) days, but this does not apply to rest of them.

If someone starts the day sick or traveling while fasting, is it permissible for them to break their fast?

● A sick person who finds fasting difficult is allowed to break their fast, whether they began the day fasting or not.
● As for a traveler:
○ If they were still at home at dawn and then traveled after Fajr (dawn), they must continue fasting unless they experience extreme hardship, in which case they may break their fast.
○ However, if they were already traveling when dawn broke—meaning they had left their town before Fajr—then they are permitted to break their fast. This is what the Prophetﷺ did during the year of the conquest (of Makkah).