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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

When is a child instructed to fast?

A child is instructed to fast at the age of seven if they are capable of fasting and have reached the age of discernment, by analogy to prayer. They should be encouraged but not forced, so they can become accustomed to it. It is obligatory for their guardian, whether a father or another, to instruct them.

Does tooth extraction during the day in Ramadan break the fast?

Simply extracting a tooth during the day in Ramadan does not break the fast. However, if water or blood enters the body cavity, the fast becomes invalid.
Whoever's fast is invalidated in this way must refrain from eating and drinking for the rest of the day out of respect for the sacred month and make up for that day later.
It is preferable to postpone the extraction until nighttime or after Ramadan if possible.

What is the ruling of Islamic Law on selling gold or silver in installments or for a differed price?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is prohibited (haram) to sell gold or silver in installments or for a deferred price; rather, immediate hand-to-hand exchange (Taqabud) is mandatory, otherwise, it is considered usury (Riba). The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: 'Gold for gold, silver for silver, wheat for wheat, barley for barley, dates for dates, and salt for salt—like for like, hand to hand. Whoever increases or asks for an increase has engaged in Riba; the receiver and the giver are the same in this regard.' (Narrated by Muslim). Furthermore, when exchanging new gold for used gold, they must be of equal weight, or it falls into Riba.
 
The permissible solution (al-makhraj) is for the merchant to purchase the used gold for cash first, and then sell the new gold for cash in a separate transaction. However, the price must be paid during the sitting of the contract (Majlis al-Aqd) for both deals. Alternatively, the jeweler may take the used gold with the intent of remodeling or repairing it, and then charge a fee for the craftsmanship or repair work. And Allah the Exalted knows best."

What is the ruling on the follower`s prayer if the Imam stands for a fifth rak`ah?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
If the Imam stands up for an extra unit (rak‘ah) of prayer out of forgetfulness, he must return to the sitting position as soon as he remembers, and he should perform the prostration of forgetfulness (Sujud al-Sahw). It is the duty of the congregants (Ma’mumin) behind him to remind him. However, if the Imam is in a state of doubt regarding the extra unit (and not certainty), it is not permissible for him to return.
 
As for the congregants: anyone who is certain that the Imam has stood for an extra unit is forbidden from following him. In this case, the follower has two choices: either intend to separate from the Imam (Mufaraqah) and finish the prayer alone, or wait for the Imam in the sitting position and perform the final salams with him—the latter being the preferred option. If a follower knowingly follows the Imam into an extra unit, their prayer becomes invalid. However, if a follower is in doubt and not certain of the mistake, they must continue following the Imam, as the Imam was appointed to be followed.
 
It is stated in Al-Majmu’ (Vol.4/P.145): 'If [the Imam] stands for a fifth rak‘ah, the follower should not follow him, even if it is assumed that the Imam might have omitted a pillar from a previous unit; because if the reality is known, following him is impermissible since the follower has certainly completed their own prayer. Even if the follower had missed a previous unit (Masbuq) or was in doubt about performing a pillar like the Fatihah, and the Imam stood for the fifth, it is not permissible for the latecomer to follow him in it. This is because we know that this unit is not counted for the Imam and that he is mistaken in performing it.' And Allah the Exalted knows best.