Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it acceptable to perform the Aqiqah for a male child by slaughtering and distributing the first sheep, and bringing the second one cooked from the restaurant?

 

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.

It is permissible to slaughter the first sheep with the intention of Aqiqah (the newborn's sacrificial offering) and distribute it entirely [uncooked], and to slaughter the second sheep and have it cooked at a restaurant to bring home for the household. However, it must be noted that it is obligatory to give some portion of the Aqiqah in charity to the poor, even if it is a small amount, though it is preferable to send the food cooked to them.

Buying a pre-cooked, ready-made sheep from a restaurant does not suffice as an Aqiqah. However, if an agreement is made with the restaurant to explicitly slaughter a sheep with the intention of Aqiqah for the newborn, and then cook it afterward, this is permissible.

In conclusion, slaughtering the sheep and distributing it with the intention of Aqiqah is permissible, and through it, the foundational prophetic tradition (Sunnah) is fulfilled. As for simply buying a cooked sheep from a restaurant that was not specifically slaughtered with the intention of Aqiqah, it will not count as such. Conversely, if the restaurant owner is commissioned (Wakala) to handle both the slaughtering and the cooking as an Aqiqah, it is valid. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on performing the night prayer (*qiyām al-layl*) between the first and second adhān of Fajr? And which is better: delaying the prayer until shortly before the Fajr adhān, or performing it earlier than that?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The time for night prayer (qiyām al-layl) begins after the Maghrib prayer and lasts until the second adhān of Fajr. The best time for it is the last third of the night, and best of all are the fourth and fifth sixths of the night. If the night is divided into two halves, the latter half is better.
Whoever intends to pray at night is encouraged to delay the Witr until he has prayed the night prayer. If he knows that he will not wake up, it is better for him to pray and perform Witr before sleeping, so that he does not miss both the night prayer and the Witr.
It is stated in Mughnī al-Muḥtāj (Vpl.1/p.462): “I say: The voluntary prayer of the night, that is, the absolute voluntary prayer (al-nafl al-muṭlaq), is better than the absolute voluntary prayer of the day, because of the report in Muslim: ‘The best prayer after the obligatory prayer is the night prayer.’ In another narration of his: ‘In the night there is an hour that no Muslim man meets while asking Allah for any good of this world and the next except that He gives it to him, and that is every night.’ It is also because the night is a time of heedlessness. I restricted the voluntary prayer to the absolute kind following the commentator, although what the ḥadīth and the underlying meaning require is that the night rawātib be preferred over the day rawātib, since the jurists preferred the two rakʿahs of Fajr over everything except Witr. The middle of the night is better than its two ends if it is divided into thirds, because heedlessness is greatest then and worship is hardest. If he wishes to pray during some third, the best is the fourth and fifth sixths, based on the ḥadīth in the two Ṣaḥīḥs: ‘The most beloved prayer to Allah the Exalted is the prayer of Dāwūd: he would sleep half the night, stand for a third of it, and sleep for a sixth.’ Then the latter part is better than the first if he divides it into two halves, because of the saying of Allah the Exalted: ‘And in the hours before dawn they would ask forgiveness’ [al-Dhāriyāt: 18], and the report of the two Shaykhs: ‘Our Lord, Blessed and Exalted, descends,’ meaning His command descends, ‘to the lowest heaven when the last third of the night remains, and says: Who calls upon Me, that I may answer him? Who asks of Me, that I may give him? Who seeks My forgiveness, that I may forgive him?’”
It is also stated in ʿUmdat al-Sālik (p. 60): “It is better to perform it [the Witr] immediately after the sunnah of ʿIshāʾ, unless he has tahajjud, in which case it is better to delay it so that he performs Witr after it. If he performs Witr and then wishes to pray tahajjud, he prays two rakʿahs at a time and does not repeat the Witr, nor does he need to cancel it with a single rakʿah before the tahajjud. It is recommended that he not deliberately pray after it.”
Qiyām al-layl is a term applied to any prayer performed at night. Tahajjud, on the other hand, refers to the night prayer that follows sleep, whether it is prayed after Maghrib or after ʿIshāʾ, or the prayer performed after ʿIshāʾ without sleep. On this basis, the Witr is also called tahajjud, since it is only prayed after ʿIshāʾ.
It is stated in al-Majmūʿ (Vol.4/p.84): “The sound position, as stated in al-Umm and al-Mukhtaṣar, is that the Witr is called tahajjud.”
It is stated in Nihāyat al-Zayn (Vol.1/p.114): “Among the absolute voluntary prayers is qiyām al-layl. If it is performed after sleep, even during the time of Maghrib and after having prayed ʿIshāʾ early (taqdīman), it is called tahajjud.”
And it is stated in Ḥāshiyat al-Bujayrimī ʿalā al-Khaṭīb (Vol.1/p.418): “His statement: ‘(the night prayer)’: the genitive construction (iḍāfah) carries the sense of fī, meaning a prayer in the night. His statement: ‘(it would be more fitting)’: the reason it is more fitting is that the night prayer includes both tahajjud and other prayers.” And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the wisdom behind legislating the Udhiyah?

The Muslim must know that through the Uḍḥiyah, he complies with the command of Allah, the Exalted, and performs a worship that brings him closer to Allah and distances him from the Fire.
 
The Uḍḥiyah holds profound wisdoms and noble meanings, including:
 
1-Reviving the Sunnah of Abraham, peace be upon him: He complied with Allah's command when He ordered him to slaughter his son Ishmael. Abraham, peace be upon him, succeeded in the test, and when he was about to slaughter his son, Allah sent down a ram to ransom Ishmael and commanded him to slaughter it instead. Allah, the Exalted, says {what means]: "And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, 'O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think.' He said, 'O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast.' And when they had both submitted and he put him down upon his forehead, We called to him, 'O Abraham, You have fulfilled the vision.' Indeed, We thus reward the doers of good. Indeed, this was the clear trial. And We ransomed him with a great sacrifice." [Al-Ṣāffāt/102-107]. Thus, the sacrificial offering became an enduring Sunnah until the Day of Judgment, and Muslims offer their wealth as sacrifices, drawing closer to Allah, the Exalted, reviving this great Sunnah.
 
2-Providing abundance for people on Eid day and the Days of Tashrīq: Among the wisdoms of the Uḍḥiyah is that the Muslim provides generously for his family, neighbors, relatives, and the poor during these days. The Muslim is encouraged to eat from his sacrifice, give charity from it to the poor, and gift from it to his wealthy neighbors. Thus, goodness spreads throughout the entire community. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "The Days of Tashrīq are days of eating and drinking." (Narrated by Muslim). Allah, the Exalted, says {what means}: "And the camels and cattle We have appointed for you as among the symbols of Allah; for you therein is good." [Al-Ḥajj/36]. This good includes the good of both this world and the Hereafter.

Does post-natal bleeding (Nifas) stop before forty days after childbirth?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Yes, post-natal bleeding (Nifas) can cease before the completion of forty days. If the bleeding stops completely and its return is not expected, the woman has attained ritual purity (Taharah), even if forty days have not yet passed. And Allah the Exalted knows best.