Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

Can someone break a make up fast (qada) after beginning it?

Once a person begins a make up fast (qada), it is prohibited to break it.
If they break it without a valid excuse, they are sinful, and the missed Ramadan fast remains a debt upon them.

Is it permissible to offer an Udhiyah on behalf of the deceased?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Offering a sacrifice (Udhiyah) on behalf of the deceased is permissible. This is the position of the Hanbalis [Kashshaf al-Qina’ by al-Bahuti (Vol.6/P.428)], and it was held by al-Abbadi of the Shafi’is [Bidayat al-Muhtaj by Ibn Qadi Shuhbah (Vol.4/P.358)]; it is also narrated from some Maliki and Hanafi scholars.
 
Abu Dawud included a chapter in his Sunan titled "Chapter: Offering the Sacrifice on Behalf of the Deceased," in which he narrated from Hanash, who said: "I saw Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) sacrificing two rams. I asked him, 'What is this?' He replied, 'The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) enjoined me to sacrifice on his behalf, so I am sacrificing on his behalf.'"
 
Abu Dawud also narrated from Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "O Allah, this is from You and for You, on behalf of Muhammad and his Ummah; in the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest," then he slaughtered it. It is well known that among the Ummah of Muhammad (peace be upon him) are those who have passed away, yet he (peace be upon him) dedicated it to his entire Ummah.
 
Furthermore, multiple Sharia texts have consistently indicated that the rewards of righteous deeds reach the deceased. This includes the permissibility of fasting on behalf of the deceased if they died owing fasts, as well as the permissibility of performing Hajj on their behalf, both of which are established in authentic Hadiths. Since the rewards for fasting—a physical act of worship—and Hajj—a physical and financial act of worship—reach the deceased, then the sacrifice (Udhiyah) is even more likely to reach them.
 
Moreover, the scholars have reached a consensus (Ijma') that the rewards of charities reach the deceased, and the Udhiyah is a form of charity and falls under its general category. Based on all of this, we hold the view that offering a sacrifice on behalf of the deceased is permissible. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What is the wisdom behind legislating the Udhiyah?

The Muslim must know that through the Uḍḥiyah, he complies with the command of Allah, the Exalted, and performs a worship that brings him closer to Allah and distances him from the Fire.
 
The Uḍḥiyah holds profound wisdoms and noble meanings, including:
 
1-Reviving the Sunnah of Abraham, peace be upon him: He complied with Allah's command when He ordered him to slaughter his son Ishmael. Abraham, peace be upon him, succeeded in the test, and when he was about to slaughter his son, Allah sent down a ram to ransom Ishmael and commanded him to slaughter it instead. Allah, the Exalted, says {what means]: "And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, 'O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think.' He said, 'O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast.' And when they had both submitted and he put him down upon his forehead, We called to him, 'O Abraham, You have fulfilled the vision.' Indeed, We thus reward the doers of good. Indeed, this was the clear trial. And We ransomed him with a great sacrifice." [Al-Ṣāffāt/102-107]. Thus, the sacrificial offering became an enduring Sunnah until the Day of Judgment, and Muslims offer their wealth as sacrifices, drawing closer to Allah, the Exalted, reviving this great Sunnah.
 
2-Providing abundance for people on Eid day and the Days of Tashrīq: Among the wisdoms of the Uḍḥiyah is that the Muslim provides generously for his family, neighbors, relatives, and the poor during these days. The Muslim is encouraged to eat from his sacrifice, give charity from it to the poor, and gift from it to his wealthy neighbors. Thus, goodness spreads throughout the entire community. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "The Days of Tashrīq are days of eating and drinking." (Narrated by Muslim). Allah, the Exalted, says {what means}: "And the camels and cattle We have appointed for you as among the symbols of Allah; for you therein is good." [Al-Ḥajj/36]. This good includes the good of both this world and the Hereafter.

Is Zakah (obligatory charity) due on land intended for selling?

Yes, lands intended for trade are valued, and Zakah is paid according to their estimated value after a lunar year had lapsed, but if the owner didn`t pay the due Zakah, then he should do so after selling them.