Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on doubting whether one or two prostrations were performed?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
If a worshiper is in doubt regarding the number of units (rak'ahs) or prostrations (sajdahs) performed, he must build upon the minimum (i.e., assume the lower number) and perform the prostration of forgetfulness (Sujud al-Sahw) before the Salam at the end of the prayer. This is based on the report from ‘Ata’ ibn Yasar that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: 'When anyone of you is in doubt about his Salat (prayer) and does not know how many he has prayed, three or four (Rak'at) he should cast aside his doubt and base his prayer on what he is sure of. Then, he should perform two prostrations before Taslim (salutation). If he has prayed five Rak'at, they will make his Salat (prayer) an even number for him and if he has prayed exactly four, they (i.e. two prostrations) will be humiliation for the devil..' (Narrated by Abu Dawud).
 
It is stated in Al-Muqaddimah al-Hadramiyyah: 'If one doubts [whether he performed] a bowing (ruku’), a prostration, or a rak'ah, he must perform it and prostrate [for forgetfulness], even if the doubt is removed before the Salam—unless the doubt is removed before he performs what would potentially be an addition. Thus, if he doubts whether he prayed three or four, he is obligated to build upon the minimum.' And Allah the Exalted knows best.

When is a child instructed to fast?

A child is instructed to fast at the age of seven if they are capable of fasting and have reached the age of discernment, by analogy to prayer. They should be encouraged but not forced, so they can become accustomed to it. It is obligatory for their guardian, whether a father or another, to instruct them.

Is it permissible to participate in an Udhiyah?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Regarding the sacrificial offering (Udhiyah), if it is a sheep or a goat, it only avails for one person. However, if it is a cow or a camel, it avails for seven people. It is permissible for the seven participants to have different intentions; for example, some may intend the sacrifice (Udhiyah), some the ’Aqiqah (sacrifice for a newborn), and others may simply intend to obtain meat.
 
It is stated in Hashiyat Qalyubi ‘ala Sharh al-Mahalli (Vol.4/P.256) and in Bushra al-Karim (p. 706):
 
"If one slaughters a camel or a cow on behalf of seven... it is permissible. Likewise, it is permissible if some of them intend their seventh for meat, and others intend their seventh for ’Aqiqah." And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What are the Sunnahs and etiquettes recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
There are several Sunnahs and etiquettes that are recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah (sacrifice) to observe, including:
 
1-It is Sunnah for the one intending to sacrifice to refrain from removing any hair or nails once the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah begin. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "When the ten days [of Dhul-Hijjah] begin and one of you intends to offer a sacrifice, let him not touch [remove] any of his hair or skin." [Narrated by Muslim]. If someone does remove any hair or nails, they have not committed a sin, and their sacrifice remains valid.
 
2-It is recommended for the person offering the sacrifice to slaughter the animal themselves. If they are unable to do so, they should witness the slaughter. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said to Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her): "Stand and witness your sacrifice, for indeed, with its first drop of blood, your [previous sins] are forgiven." [Narrated by Al-Bayhaqi and Al-Tabarani; it is classified as a weak (da'if) hadith].
 
3-The animal should be positioned to face the Qiblah at the time of slaughter, as the Qiblah is the most noble of directions.
 
4-The slaughterer should say: "Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim" (In the name of Allah, the Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful). Even if one forgets to say it, the sacrifice is still permissible to eat. Allah (Blessed and Exalted be He) says: "So eat of that [meat] upon which the name of Allah has been mentioned" [Al-An'am: 118]. It is also recommended to send blessings upon the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) and to say "Allahu Akbar" (Allah is the Greatest) after the Tasmiyah.
 
5-The slaughterer should pray for the sacrifice to be accepted by saying: "O Allah, this is from You and for You, so please accept it from me." (Allahumma hadhihi minka wa ilayka, fataqabbal minni). And Allah the Almighty knows best.