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Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

Does burping (belching) break the fast?

Burping does not break the fast. However, if anything comes up from the stomach, the fasting person must spit it out and rinse their mouth to cleanse it.
If they swallow it intentionally while being able to expel it, or if they swallow their saliva before rinsing their mouth, their fast is invalidated.

Is it acceptable to perform the Aqiqah for a male child by slaughtering and distributing the first sheep, and bringing the second one cooked from the restaurant?

 

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.

It is permissible to slaughter the first sheep with the intention of Aqiqah (the newborn's sacrificial offering) and distribute it entirely [uncooked], and to slaughter the second sheep and have it cooked at a restaurant to bring home for the household. However, it must be noted that it is obligatory to give some portion of the Aqiqah in charity to the poor, even if it is a small amount, though it is preferable to send the food cooked to them.

Buying a pre-cooked, ready-made sheep from a restaurant does not suffice as an Aqiqah. However, if an agreement is made with the restaurant to explicitly slaughter a sheep with the intention of Aqiqah for the newborn, and then cook it afterward, this is permissible.

In conclusion, slaughtering the sheep and distributing it with the intention of Aqiqah is permissible, and through it, the foundational prophetic tradition (Sunnah) is fulfilled. As for simply buying a cooked sheep from a restaurant that was not specifically slaughtered with the intention of Aqiqah, it will not count as such. Conversely, if the restaurant owner is commissioned (Wakala) to handle both the slaughtering and the cooking as an Aqiqah, it is valid. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

For some time I have been searching for a guiding shaykh to teach me the spiritual path (*sulūk*) and the Islamic sciences, but I have not found one. What should I do?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
There is abundant good in this Ummah, and the scholars who guide and nurture are never cut off. The student of knowledge should strive in seeking them out, ask diligently after them, and draw from their learning.
As for one who cannot find a guiding and nurturing shaykh, he should send abundant prayers and peace upon our master the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), while keeping constantly to dhikr and worship and abstaining from the forbidden. For that will bring him to his goal in traveling toward Allah the Exalted. Imam Muḥammad al-Sanūsī (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “I have seen it said by some of the imams of Sufism that whoever lacks shaykhs of spiritual training (shuyūkh al-tarbiyah) should increase his invocation of blessings upon the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), for by it he will reach his goal.”
The scholar Aḥmad Zarrūq al-Mālikī (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Qawāʿid al-Taṣawwuf (p. 86), rule no. 114: “Dhikr is the decree of sainthood (manshūr al-wilāyah). Whoever is given dhikr has been given the decree. Our shaykh Abū al-ʿAbbās al-Ḥaḍramī (may Allah be pleased with him) said: ‘Keep constantly to dhikr and abundant blessings upon the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), for it is a ladder, an ascent, and a path to Allah the Exalted when the seeker does not meet a guiding shaykh.’” And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling of Islamic Law on one who died owing debts and left no wealth? Is it obligatory upon the heirs to settle these debts?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The general rule is that if a person dies owing rights to other people, such as debts, these are settled from his estate, if he left any wealth, before the estate is divided. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “The believer's soul is suspended by his debt until it is settled for him.” Graded ḥasan by al-Tirmidhī. Repayment of debts takes precedence over the heirs’ right to inheritance.
If the deceased left no estate, or left wealth that was insufficient to cover his debts, it is not obligatory for the heirs to pay from their own wealth, but it is recommended for them to do so, because the deceased’s dhimmah (legal liability) remains occupied by the debt. It is reported in some narrations that he remains held in suspension until his debt is paid, and it is not part of filial righteousness for a child to leave his father’s dhimmah burdened with debt.
All of the children may contribute to settling the debt on behalf of their father and cooperate in doing so, even in installments, according to their ability. And Allah Almighty knows best.

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