Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

For some time I have been searching for a guiding shaykh to teach me the spiritual path (*sulūk*) and the Islamic sciences, but I have not found one. What should I do?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
There is abundant good in this Ummah, and the scholars who guide and nurture are never cut off. The student of knowledge should strive in seeking them out, ask diligently after them, and draw from their learning.
As for one who cannot find a guiding and nurturing shaykh, he should send abundant prayers and peace upon our master the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), while keeping constantly to dhikr and worship and abstaining from the forbidden. For that will bring him to his goal in traveling toward Allah the Exalted. Imam Muḥammad al-Sanūsī (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “I have seen it said by some of the imams of Sufism that whoever lacks shaykhs of spiritual training (shuyūkh al-tarbiyah) should increase his invocation of blessings upon the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), for by it he will reach his goal.”
The scholar Aḥmad Zarrūq al-Mālikī (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Qawāʿid al-Taṣawwuf (p. 86), rule no. 114: “Dhikr is the decree of sainthood (manshūr al-wilāyah). Whoever is given dhikr has been given the decree. Our shaykh Abū al-ʿAbbās al-Ḥaḍramī (may Allah be pleased with him) said: ‘Keep constantly to dhikr and abundant blessings upon the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), for it is a ladder, an ascent, and a path to Allah the Exalted when the seeker does not meet a guiding shaykh.’” And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on someone who intends to travel to Jeddah for two days — must he enter iḥrām from his place of residence [i.e., before passing the mīqāt]?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Whoever is firmly resolved in his intention to perform ‘Umrah before setting out on his journey, it is unlawful for him to pass beyond his country's mīqāt (the designated boundary point for entering the state of iḥrām) without entering iḥrām. If he does so, he must return to the mīqāt to enter iḥrām from there, provided he has not yet begun performing the rites of the pilgrimage — in which case nothing further is required of him. However, if he does not return, he must offer a sacrifice (sheep/goat), to be distributed among the poor of the Ḥaram.
It is stated in at-Tanbīh fī al-Fiqh ash-Shāfi‘ī (p. 71): "Whoever, intending to perform the rites [of ‘Umrah or Ḥajj], passes beyond the mīqāt and enters iḥrām only after it, must offer a sacrifice. However, if he returns to the mīqāt before beginning any of the rites, the sacrifice is waived from him."
Accordingly: whoever is firmly resolved in his intention to perform ‘Umrah before setting out on his journey must enter iḥrām at the mīqāt of his country through which he passes. Whoever fails to do so, passing beyond the mīqāt without entering iḥrām, and does not return, has sinned, and must repent to Allah, the Exalted; and he must offer a sacrifice, to be distributed among the poor of the Ḥaram. And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling of Islamic Law on wudu (ablution) when there is an adhesive substance on the hand that is difficult to remove?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The general principle is: if what is applied to the limbs of wudu' (ablution) does not form a barrier substance preventing water from reaching the skin, then the wudu' is valid despite its presence. However, if these substances prevent water from reaching the skin, the wudu' is not valid with their presence, and they must be removed so that water reaches the hair or skin without any barrier.
Shaykh al-Islam, the Imam an-Nawawi, may Allah have mercy on him, says: "If there is wax, dough, henna, or similar substances on some of his limbs [of wudu'], and this prevents water from reaching any part of the limb, then his purification (tahara) is not valid — regardless of whether the amount is much or little. But if there remains on the hand or elsewhere only the trace and color of the henna, without its substance [i.e., the physical residue itself], or the trace of a liquid oil such that the water touches the skin of the limb and flows over it, though it does not remain [as a barrier] — then his purification is valid." [Al-Majmu' , Vol.1/P.529]. And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling on a vowed animal sacrifice?

A vowed animal sacrifice is to be distributed amongst the poor and needy, and neither the vow-maker, nor those supported by him are to eat from it.