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Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

I hired a private tutor for my son through an academy that sends teachers [to families] and takes a percentage [of their pay]. At the start of the [new] school year, I arranged directly with that same teacher, without the academy's knowledge. What is the ruling on this?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The ruling on this matter depends on knowing the specific terms of the agreement and contract concluded with the academy. If the agreement stipulates that no arrangement may be made with any of the students except through the academy itself, then it is not permissible for you to breach the terms of this contract, based on the words of our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ: "Muslims are bound by their conditions." (Related by al-Bukhārī)
However, if the agreement pertains only to teaching a specific subject, and the agreement concludes once that subject is finished, then there is no objection to arranging with the teacher to teach other subjects after the contract period has ended, outside of the academy.
Whatever the case maybe, the teacher must uphold the terms of his contract with the academy. And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling on the white discharge (*Al-Qassat al-Bayda'*) if it is in a very small amount—is it considered a sign of purity?

 
All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Among the signs of purity (Tahr) for a woman is the white discharge (Al-Qassat al-Bayda'), which is a clear, pure white fluid, regardless of whether it is minimal in quantity, or complete dryness (Jafaf), wherein secretions cease entirely such that if a white cotton cloth is inserted, it comes out completely clean. Once a woman observes either of these two signs, she has attained ritual purity.
 
Furthermore, another sign of purity is when the duration of the menstrual period exceeds the maximum limit of menstruation, which is fifteen days. If it exceeds this period, it becomes evident that she is experiencing non-menstrual bleeding (Istihadah).
 
The rulings pertaining to menstruation may be reviewed in the article: "Rulings on Menstruation and Postnatal Bleeding Every Muslim Woman Must Know." And Allah Almighty knows best.

Is the niṣāb calculated based on the price of 21-karat gold, or 24-karat gold?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Zakāh is obligatory on cash and on gold designated for saving or for trade, provided the total reaches the niṣāb (minimum threshold liable for zakah), and a full ḥawl (lunar year) has elapsed over it. The niṣāb is (85) grams of 24-karat gold; for 21-karat gold, the niṣāb equals (97) grams; and for 18-karat gold, it equals (113) grams.
The relied-upon position is to calculate the zakāh based on the buying price [i.e., the price the gold merchant would pay the owner to purchase the gold from him] on the day the zakāh obligation is due.
The one paying zakāh may assess/calculate the niṣāb using any of the aforementioned gold karats [i.e., he may choose whichever karat standard he wishes for the purpose of the calculation]. And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the meaning of the Prophetic statement that a boy is held in pledge (murtahan) for his 'aqīqah?

All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The first interpretation: That if the boy dies in infancy without an 'aqīqah having been performed on his behalf, he will not intercede for his parents on the Day of Resurrection. This is the position of Imam Aḥmad ibn Ḥanbal, and Imam al-Khaṭṭābī concurred with him, stating: "The finest of what has been said regarding this matter is the position adopted by Aḥmad ibn Ḥanbal." — [Fatḥ al-Bārī by Ibn Ḥajar,{Vol.9/P.594]
The second interpretation: That the child is likened to a pledged object (marhūn) — one from which full benefit and enjoyment cannot be derived until it is redeemed. A blessing is only made complete upon the one blessed when they fulfil the obligation of gratitude (shukr), and the prescribed expression of gratitude for this particular blessing is what the Prophet ﷺ established as Sunnah — namely, the slaughtering of the 'aqīqah on behalf of the newborn as an act of thankfulness to Allah the Almighty and as a supplication for the wellbeing and safety of the child. This is the position of Mullā 'Alī al-Qārī. See: [Mirqāt al-Mafātīḥ Sharḥ Mishkāt al-Maṣābīḥ, Vol.7/P.2688]
And Allah Almighty knows best.

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