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Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 04-01-2021

Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation

 

 

A group of people thinks that sternness, mercilessness, anger and violence embody strength or manhood and they give a person control over different situations, however, this is incorrect. In principle, forbearance, leniency and kindness are the basis for dealing with others and they bring hearts and minds together. Allah The Almighty Says (What means): "It is part of the Mercy of Allah that thou dost deal gently with them Wert thou severe or harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about thee: so pass over (their faults), and ask for (Allah's) forgiveness for them; and consult them in affairs (of moment). Then, when thou hast taken a decision put thy trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)." [Al-Imran/159]. Thus, kindness, leniency and forbearance pass on to the next generations and love bears the fruit of righteousness, which is the golden key for the hearts of all people.

 

Therefore, in several narrations, Prophet (PBUH) urged Muslims to observe forbearance and kindness when dealing with others. This is in order for a Muslim to have self-control and become a successful role model in his relations with others: in-laws, children, neighbors, and colleagues…etcetera. 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Whenever forbearance is added to something, it adorns it; and whenever it is withdrawn from something, it leaves it defective." [Moslim].

 

Moreover, 'Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased with her), the wife of Allah's Apostle (PBUH), reported that Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said: "'Aisha, verily Allah is Kind and He loves kindness and confers upon kindness which he does not confer upon severity and does not confer upon anything else besides it (kindness)." [Moslim].

 

In addition, Jarir b. 'Abdullah (May Allah Be Pleased with him) reported Allah's Apostle (PBUH) as saying:

"He who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good and he who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good." [Moslim].

 

Since violence usually stems from anger, our Prophet (PBUH) forbade it and commanded us not to get angry. He (PBUH) said: "On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him): A man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): "Counsel me, so he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." The man repeated [his request for counsel] several times, and [each time] he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." [Al-Bukhari]. 

 

Furthermore, Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "The strong man is not the one who wrestles, but the strong man is in fact the one who controls himself in a fit of rage." [Al-Bukhari].

 

Kindness, leniency and forbearance are the bricks of healthy human relationships and each Muslim should maintain his different relations according to this scale. And Allah is the One Who Bestows all that is good. 

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible to give to the poor from among the People of the Book from the Udhiyah?

Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is permissible to give to the poor among the People of the Book from a voluntary sacrifice (uḍḥiyyat taṭawwuʿ), just as it is permissible to give charity (ṣadaqah) to them. This opinion is a view (wajh) within the Shāfiʿī school, which was favored by al-Muḥibb al-Ṭabarī and Imam al-Nawawī. [See: Ḥāshiyat Ibn Qāsim al-ʿAbbādī ʿalā Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj (Vol.9/P.365)]. And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on a Friday sermon in which the khaṭīb did not explicitly exhort the congregation to be conscious of Allah (taqwā) in both sermons, but sufficed with commanding them to obey Allah and refrain from disobeying Him?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
For the Friday sermon (khuṭbat al-Jumʿah) to be valid, certain essential pillars (arkān) must be fulfilled. Among these is the exhortation to be conscious of Allah (waṣiyyah bi-taqwā Allāh), which must be present in both sermons. Alongside this pillar, the praising of Allah (ḥamdallah) and the sending of blessings upon the Messenger of Allah ﷺ are equally required.
Shaykh al-Islām Imām Ibn Ḥajar al-Haytamī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "These three are pillars in each of the two sermons, because each sermon is independent and separate from the other." [Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj,Vol.4/P.447]
It is not a condition that the exhortation be expressed in any specific wording, nor is it required that the word "taqwā" itself be used — such as saying "I exhort you to be conscious of Allah." Rather, this pillar is fulfilled by any expression that contains a command to obey Allah the Almighty and to abstain from what He has prohibited.
Imām al-Khaṭīb al-Sharbīnī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "The third pillar is the exhortation to taqwā... The specific wording of this exhortation is not required, according to the most correct view, because the purpose is admonition and the urging of obedience to Allah the Almighty. Therefore, any expression that conveys admonition suffices — whether long or short — such as: 'Obey Allah and be ever mindful of Him.'" [Mughnī al-Muḥtāj,Vol.1/P.550]
Accordingly, what the khaṭīb has done — by commanding obedience to Allah and forbidding disobedience to Him in both sermons — is valid and sufficient. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on a woman using contraception without her husband's knowledge if he is mistreating her?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It is not permissible for a woman to use any means of delaying pregnancy without her husband's knowledge, consent, and mutual agreement. This is because having children is a sharʿī right belonging to both spouses equally in Islamic law. Imām al-Māwardī, may Allah have mercy upon him, stated: "The right to a child from a free woman is shared between them both" — meaning between the two spouses. [al-Ḥāwī al-Kabīr, 9/320]
It is therefore not permissible for either spouse to make a unilateral decision regarding the prevention of pregnancy without the consent of the other. We advise both spouses to discuss the matter with wisdom and mutual respect, so as to resolve any disagreement and arrive at a suitable solution that serves the interests of them both. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What is the Du`a (supplication) of Istikhara (guidance prayer)?

O Allah, I consult You as You are All-Knowing and I appeal to You to give me power as You are Omnipotent, I ask You for Your great favor, for You have power and I do not, and You know all of the hidden matters. O Allah! If you know that this matter (then he should mention it) is good for me in my religion, my livelihood, and for my life in the Hereafter, or he said: "for my present and future life" then make it (easy) for me. And if you know that this matter is not good for me in my religion, my livelihood and my life in the Hereafter, or he said: "for my present and future life" then keep it away from me and take me away from it and choose what is good for me wherever it is and please me with it."