Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?
No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible to swear by (Allah "The Living")?
Yes, it is permissible because "The Living" is one of Allah`s Attributes.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
What is the ruling when the duration of the monthly period varies, and sporadically increases?
If the period didn`t exceed (15) days from the first seeing of blood discharges until its end including the times of temporary cessation, then it is menses. But, if the period exceeded (15) days, then the woman experiencing this is Mostahadah (bleeding outside the time of monthly period), and should abide by her regular period, and consult one of the scholars.