Is it permissible for the young woman to turn the suitor down if she had no feelings for him?
Yes, it is permissible for her to do so.
Is it true that if a ritually impure, or a menstruating woman visits one who is in confinement, harm will be inflicted on the latter, or her baby?
This is completely wrong and unfounded piece of information.
I have asked a marriage official to conclude my marriage since I have no proxy and, being an adult, I can act as the proxy of myself, but he refused. What should I do?
All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May Allah`s peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
In order for a marriage to be valid there must be a Wali (Guardian) for the woman: father, brother, paternal uncle or any paternal relative. If there isn`t any, then the judge can act as the woman`s guardian and conclude the marriage contract. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law?
It is forbidden for the woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law because he isn`t a Mahram (unmarriageable) of hers.