Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
What should a person do if they suffer from an incurable illness that prevents them from fasting?
A person who has an illness that is not expected to be cured and prevents them from fasting must feed a needy person one mudd (600 grams) of food (such as wheat or rice) for each missed day instead of fasting.
Allah Almighty says {what means}: "and [in such cases] it is incumbent upon those who can afford it to make sacrifice by feeding a needy person." [Al-Baqarah/184].
Is it permissible for a person to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) to his daughter-in-law?
Yes, it is permissible for a person to give the Zakah to his daughter-in-law if she was poor, and none provided for particularly by whom are obliged to provide for her. And Allah Knows Best.
What is the ruling on making up missed fasts from many years?
A Muslim must make up for any missed fasts, as they are a debt owed to Allah. The Prophet ﷺ said:
"The debt owed to Allah is more deserving of being fulfilled." [Narrated by Muslim]
Whoever has missed fasts must make them up as long as they are alive and capable of fasting.