Is it permissible for a wife to refuse to go to bed with her husband (for sexual intercourse)?
It isn`t permissible for her to do so unless for a sound reason.
Is it permissible for a woman to wear underwear while performing Umrah?
Yes, it is permissible for a woman to wear underwear while performing Umrah. This is because she should keep her regular clothes that cover all her body while being in a state of Ihram (ritual consecration) for Hajj, or Umrah. However, she should uncover her face and hands, but it is permissible for her to let her head-covering garment drape from her head down over her face when non-Mahram (i.e., marriageable) men pass by her. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it incumbent on a father to cover the marriage costs of his son if the latter couldn`t afford them?
The son should seek the help of his relatives in order to convince his father to do the aforesaid, and the father should make sure that his son doesn`t commit fornication through helping him to get married, and Allah will reward him for doing so.
Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.