What is the meaning of the Udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The Udhiyah (Sacrificial Offering) refers to the livestock (An'am) that is slaughtered as an act of drawing closer to Allah the Almighty. This takes place on the day of Eid al-Adha (the 10th of Dhu al-Hijjah) and during the three days of Tashreeq that follow the day of Eid. And Allah the Exalted knows best.
When does the time for Udhiyah begin?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The time for Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) begins once the sun has risen on the day of Eid al-Adha—which is the tenth of Dhul-Hijjah—and a period of time has passed equivalent to two brief prayer units (Raka'at) and two brief sermons (Khutbah). It then continues until the sunset of the last of the days of Tashreeq, which are the eleventh, twelfth, and thirteenth of Dhul-Hijjah.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "All the mountain passes of Mina are places of sacrifice, and in all the days of Tashreeq there is slaughtering." [Narrated by Al-Bayhaqi and Ibn Hibban].
The best time to slaughter is after finishing the Eid prayer, due to the saying of the Prophet (peace be upon him):
"Indeed, the first thing we begin with on this day of ours is to pray, then we return and slaughter. Whoever does that has attained our Sunnah, and whoever slaughters before [the prayer], it is only meat he has presented to his family; it is not part of the ritual sacrifice (Nusuk) in any way." [ٌReported by Bukhari & Muslim].
It is valid to sacrifice at any time, whether by night or by day; however, it is disliked (Makruh) at night. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
What is the ruling on istibra' and how is it performed?
Istibra' (cleansing from urine) is recommended. It is for a person to ensure that nothing remains of urine in its passage before performing istinja'. Its method is: to clear the throat (or cough slightly), shake the penis (meaning to pass fingers along it to expel any remaining urine if needed), and walk a few steps to the extent that one thinks nothing of urine remains if walking is needed. Each person knows his own nature best. The preferred opinion is that this differs among people. The objective is for one to think that nothing remains in the urinary passage that he fears will exit later. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.