I can`t afford to get married, what should I do to curb my sexual drives?
You should offer a lot of voluntary fasting, keep busy with useful and permissible acts and make supplication to Allah, The Exalted.
What is the ruling on one who vows to fast a specific or non-specific year? Are the two Eids, the days of Tashreeq, Ramadan, and the days of menstruation and postnatal bleeding included in them? And do these days break the consecutiveness if it was intended?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
If someone makes a vow (Nadr) to fast a specific, designated year, this vow does not include the days of Eid, the days of Tashreeq (the three days following Eid al-Adha), Ramadan, or the days of menstruation (Hayd) and postnatal bleeding (Nifas). Furthermore, there is no requirement to make up (Qada) these specific days.
However, if someone vows to fast a year that is not specifically designated (i.e., any twelve-month period) and stipulates that the fasting must be consecutive, they are bound by that condition. They must not fast on the days of Eid, during Ramadan, or during menstruation, but they are required to make up these days afterward—with the exception of the days of menstruation and postnatal bleeding, which do not need to be made up.
It is stated in Hashiyat al-Bajuri ‘ala Sharh Ibn Qasim ({Vol.2/P.606): 'If one vows to fast a specific year, the Eid, Tashreeq, Ramadan, and days of menstruation or postnatal bleeding are not included. This is because Ramadan does not accept any fast other than its own, and the others do not accept fasting at all. Therefore, they do not enter into the vow, and no makeup is required for them because they are legally excluded—contrary to Al-Rafi’i regarding menstruation and postnatal bleeding.
If one vows to fast a non-designated year: if they stipulated consecutiveness (Tatuabu’) in their vow, they must fulfill it; otherwise, they are not bound to it. Consecutiveness is not broken by the days that do not enter into the specific year vow (Eid, Tashreeq, Ramadan, menstruation, and postnatal bleeding). However, one must make up the days missed—excluding the time of menstruation and postnatal bleeding—immediately following the end of the year. As for the time of menstruation and postnatal bleeding, it is not made up, contrary to Ibn al-Rif’ah, who argued that it must be made up just like Ramadan.' And Allah the Exalted knows best.
What are the Sunnahs and etiquettes recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
There are several Sunnahs and etiquettes that are recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah (sacrifice) to observe, including:
1. Refraining from Cutting Hair and Nails
It is Sunnah for the one intending to sacrifice to refrain from removing any hair or nails once the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah begin.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "When the ten days [of Dhul-Hijjah] begin and one of you intends to offer a sacrifice, let him not touch [remove] any of his hair or skin." [Narrated by Muslim].
If someone does remove any hair or nails, they have not committed a sin, and their sacrifice remains valid.
2. Performing the Slaughter Personally (or Witnessing it)
It is recommended for the person offering the sacrifice to slaughter the animal themselves. If they are unable to do so, they should witness the slaughter.
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said to Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her): "Stand and witness your sacrifice, for indeed, with its first drop of blood, your [previous sins] are forgiven." [Narrated by Al-Bayhaqi and Al-Tabarani; it is classified as a weak (da'if) hadith].
3. Facing the Qiblah
The animal should be positioned to face the Qiblah at the time of slaughter, as the Qiblah is the most noble of directions.
4. Mentioning Allah's Name (Tasmiyah)
The slaughterer should say: "Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim" (In the name of Allah, the Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful). Even if one forgets to say it, the sacrifice is still permissible to eat.
Allah (Blessed and Exalted be He) says: "So eat of that [meat] upon which the name of Allah has been mentioned" [Al-An'am: 118].
It is also recommended to send blessings upon the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) and to say "Allahu Akbar" (Allah is the Greatest) after the Tasmiyah.
5. Supplicating for Acceptance
The slaughterer should pray for the sacrifice to be accepted by saying:
"O Allah, this is from You and for You, so please accept it from me." (Allahumma hadhihi minka wa ilayka, fataqabbal minni).
And Allah the Almighty knows best.
When does the time for Udhiyah begin?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The time for Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) begins once the sun has risen on the day of Eid al-Adha—which is the tenth of Dhul-Hijjah—and a period of time has passed equivalent to two brief prayer units (Raka'at) and two brief sermons (Khutbah). It then continues until the sunset of the last of the days of Tashreeq, which are the eleventh, twelfth, and thirteenth of Dhul-Hijjah.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "All the mountain passes of Mina are places of sacrifice, and in all the days of Tashreeq there is slaughtering." [Narrated by Al-Bayhaqi and Ibn Hibban].
The best time to slaughter is after finishing the Eid prayer, due to the saying of the Prophet (peace be upon him):
"Indeed, the first thing we begin with on this day of ours is to pray, then we return and slaughter. Whoever does that has attained our Sunnah, and whoever slaughters before [the prayer], it is only meat he has presented to his family; it is not part of the ritual sacrifice (Nusuk) in any way." [ٌReported by Bukhari & Muslim].
It is valid to sacrifice at any time, whether by night or by day; however, it is disliked (Makruh) at night. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
