Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Is it permissible to participate in an Udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
Regarding the sacrificial offering (Udhiyah), if it is a sheep or a goat, it only avails for one person. However, if it is a cow or a camel, it avails for seven people. It is permissible for the seven participants to have different intentions; for example, some may intend the sacrifice (Udhiyah), some the ’Aqiqah (sacrifice for a newborn), and others may simply intend to obtain meat.
It is stated in Hashiyat Qalyubi ‘ala Sharh al-Mahalli (Vol.4/P.256) and in Bushra al-Karim (p. 706):
"If one slaughters a camel or a cow on behalf of seven... it is permissible. Likewise, it is permissible if some of them intend their seventh for meat, and others intend their seventh for ’Aqiqah." And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible to pay the Zakah (obligatory charity) for settling the debt of a deceased relative?
It is impermissible to pay the Zakah for settling the debt of the deceased since Zakah is paid to eligible recipients who are alive. As for the debts of the deceased, they are to be settled from the estate before dividing it amongst the heirs, but if the deceased didn`t leave an estate, then it is desirable for his/her heirs to settle those debts if they can afford them. And Allah Knows Best.
Is my husband entitled to take my salary?
Your salary is yours, and you may give some of it to him as a kind of free-will contribution.