Is it permissible to pay the Zakah (obligatory charity) for settling the debt of a deceased relative?
It is impermissible to pay the Zakah for settling the debt of the deceased since Zakah is paid to eligible recipients who are alive. As for the debts of the deceased, they are to be settled from the estate before dividing it amongst the heirs, but if the deceased didn`t leave an estate, then it is desirable for his/her heirs to settle those debts if they can afford them. And Allah Knows Best.
What is the best charity to offer on behalf of the deceased? Is it giving food, reciting Quran, giving money or supplicating? What is the best charity to offer on behalf of dead father and dead husband? What is the best continuous charity to offer on behalf of the deceased?
Praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. The deceased benefits from every righteous deed offered on his/her behalf, be that continuous charity, reciting Quran or a pious son praying for him/her. However, the best righteous deed is performing Haj and Omrah on their behalf especially if he/she hadn`t performed that ritual for it remains a debt on them. The evidence on this is that Ibn 'Abbas (Allah be pleased with them) reported: A man came to the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and said: "Messenger of Allah, my mother has died (in a state) that she had to observe fasts of a month (of Ramadan). Should I complete (them) on her behalf? Thereupon he (the Holy Prophet) said: Would you not pay the debt if your mother had died (without paying it)? He said: Yes. He (the Holy Prophet) said: The debt of Allah deserves more that it should be paid."{Related by Muslim}. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is my husband entitled to take my salary?
Your salary is yours, and you may give some of it to him as a kind of free-will contribution.
Is it incumbent on a wife whose husband hasn`t gone to bed with her (for sexual intercourse) for many years to observe `Iddah (waiting period) upon his death?
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His Peace and Blessings be upon our Prophet Muhmmad and upon all of his family and companions.
Upon the death of the husband, a wife is obliged to observe the `Iddah even if he hadn`t slept with her because she inherits him. And Allah Knows Best.