Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

Article Number [ Previous | Next ]

Read for Author




Comments


Captcha


Warning: this window is not dedicated to receive religious questions, but to comment on topics published for the benefit of the site administrators—and not for publication. We are pleased to receive religious questions in the section "Send Your Question". So we apologize to readers for not answering any questions through this window of "Comments" for the sake of work organization. Thank you.




Summarized Fatawaa

Do the Jinn have anything to do with the disappearance of objects?

Jinn are one of Allah creatures, and whosoever lost anything should look for it and never accuse niether the Jinn nor humans of stealing it. And Allah Knows Best.

My husband told me that he concluded our marriage with a fake name that belongs to another person, because he was sentenced. Nowadays, he recieved an ID, passport and birth certificate with the his current name. What is the ruling on being married to him?

Praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.  As regards being married to the person mentioned in your question: The marriage is valid so long as he was the same person your guardian concluded the marriage with, even if he changed his name i.e. if your marriage contract was concluded with the same person, since what counts regarding marriage is the persons not names. And Allah Knows Best.

 

Is it permissible for the heirs of the person who caused the accident (The Killer) to fast (The intended as an expiation for unintentional killing) on his behalf if the latter died in the crash?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
 
One who dies while liable for obligatory fast, his/her guardians have the choice to either fast on his/her behalf or feed one poor Muslim for each day of missed fast. This applies to Ramadan and other obligatory fast, and since expiatory fast is obligatory, feeding a poor person for each missed day or fasting on behalf of the deceased is obligatory as well. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

I work in an accounting and auditing office, and among the clients of the office are restaurants, hotels, and supermarkets that sell alcohol. Our work is limited to collecting invoices, whether purchases, sales, or expenses, and recording them in daily books. We also review income and sales taxes on behalf of these clients.

You are more knowledgeable about the nature of your work. If you see it as assisting in wrongdoing, then it is forbidden, as Allah The Exalted Says (What means): "And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression" [Al-Ma’idah/2]. However, if your work is merely documenting the reality, then I hope there is no sin upon you. The the pious predecessors (Salaf) used to take the tithe from the traders of the People of the Book, even if it included alcohol, after knowing the value of their goods. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.