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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

هذا المقال يعبر عن رأي كاتبه، ولا يعبر بالضرورة عن رأي دائرة الإفتاء العام

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible to offer Istikhara prayer (seeking guidance) after Witr Prayer (A confirmed Sunnah which is offered after Isha prayer and before Fajir prayer with a minimum of 3 Rak`as and a maximum of 11)?

It is permissible to offer Istikhara before and after Witr prayer as it is permissible at any time except that in which prayer is disliked. And Allah Knows Best.

Is permissible to include a will requesting that a Holy Qur'an buried along with me?

It is not permissible to include a will requesting that a Quran be buried with the deceased in their grave. This is because the body of the deceased typically decomposes and may release impure substances, and it is not allowed to expose the Quran to impurity. Intentionally desecrating the Quran is an act of disbelief. Instead, read the Quran during your lifetime, as it will benefit you after death. And Allah Knows Best.

How is night prayer offered?

Night prayer is offering voluntary prayer after Maghrib and before Fajr (Dawn). As for Tahajjud, it is offering voluntary prayer at night after waking up voluntarily, and for Allah`s sake as He Says (What means): "And pray in the small watches of the morning: (it would be) an additional prayer (or spiritual profit) for thee: soon will thy Lord raise thee to a Station of Praise and Glory!" [Al-Isra`/79]. Offering Tahajjud is better than offering voluntary prayer before going to bed.

What should a sick person, who is incapable of fasting, and who didn`t make up for missed fasting days, do?

One who has missed fasting days is obliged to make up for them, but if he/she wasn`t able to because of an incurable disease , or old age, then he/she has to pay a ransom which is feeding a needy person for each of the missed fasting days. And Allah Knows Best.