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Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 04-01-2021

Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation

 

 

A group of people thinks that sternness, mercilessness, anger and violence embody strength or manhood and they give a person control over different situations, however, this is incorrect. In principle, forbearance, leniency and kindness are the basis for dealing with others and they bring hearts and minds together. Allah The Almighty Says (What means): "It is part of the Mercy of Allah that thou dost deal gently with them Wert thou severe or harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about thee: so pass over (their faults), and ask for (Allah's) forgiveness for them; and consult them in affairs (of moment). Then, when thou hast taken a decision put thy trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)." [Al-Imran/159]. Thus, kindness, leniency and forbearance pass on to the next generations and love bears the fruit of righteousness, which is the golden key for the hearts of all people.

 

Therefore, in several narrations, Prophet (PBUH) urged Muslims to observe forbearance and kindness when dealing with others. This is in order for a Muslim to have self-control and become a successful role model in his relations with others: in-laws, children, neighbors, and colleagues…etcetera. 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Whenever forbearance is added to something, it adorns it; and whenever it is withdrawn from something, it leaves it defective." [Moslim].

 

Moreover, 'Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased with her), the wife of Allah's Apostle (PBUH), reported that Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said: "'Aisha, verily Allah is Kind and He loves kindness and confers upon kindness which he does not confer upon severity and does not confer upon anything else besides it (kindness)." [Moslim].

 

In addition, Jarir b. 'Abdullah (May Allah Be Pleased with him) reported Allah's Apostle (PBUH) as saying:

"He who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good and he who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good." [Moslim].

 

Since violence usually stems from anger, our Prophet (PBUH) forbade it and commanded us not to get angry. He (PBUH) said: "On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him): A man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): "Counsel me, so he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." The man repeated [his request for counsel] several times, and [each time] he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." [Al-Bukhari]. 

 

Furthermore, Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "The strong man is not the one who wrestles, but the strong man is in fact the one who controls himself in a fit of rage." [Al-Bukhari].

 

Kindness, leniency and forbearance are the bricks of healthy human relationships and each Muslim should maintain his different relations according to this scale. And Allah is the One Who Bestows all that is good. 

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

My husband wanted to sell a piece of land that was his own, but his father insisted that he transfer the land in his (the father’s) name so that he could sell it at a higher price. Then, my husband and his father would split the price. After my father-in-law sold the land, he denied everything and refused to acknowledge my husband’s right. My father-in-law passed away a year ago, and my husband’s brothers divided the inheritance, refusing to acknowledge that this land was a trust held by their father for my husband until it was sold. Are they sinful for knowingly denying that the land belongs to my husband, and what is the ruling on praying against them?
 
 
 
 
 

All perfect praise be to Alalh, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His Peace and Blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.
Among the rights of the deceased upon their heirs are: preparing them for burial at death, settling their debts, returning people’s rights to them, executing their will, and then dividing their estate. What was mentioned in the question falls under the rights of others, even if they are among the heirs, and the deceased is not absolved of it unless it is returned to its rightful owners. This is because Allah, Almighty, forbids consuming others' wealth/properties unjustly. However, do not give up on seeking a solution by involving righteous and well - respected individuals who may have influence over them, in the hope that Allah guides them to goodness and correctness. As for supplicating against them, the prayer of the oppressed is not rejected, even if the oppressed person is not a Muslim. And Allah knows best.
 
 
 
 
 

I`m in love with a certain man, and want to marry him in particular, but my family refused that, what should I do?

The father should know what is in the best interest of his daughter and consider her situation. On her part, the daughter should trust her father`s view point as far as suitors are concerned. Moreover, it is prohibited for any woman, or girl to get involved in a relation with a non-Mahram (Marriageable man).

My husband has deprived me of visiting my family and is threatening to take my 7-month-old baby girl. Is he entitled to do so?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
Your question is unclear, but family visitation is a legitimate right of yours. However, if he deprives you from this, try to convince him with wisdom and fair preaching. If there is a problem between you two, try to fix it. As for your daughter, you are most entitled to her custody anyway. Even if he divorced you, the girl remains under your care so long as you don`t get married. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

What is the ruling on having brotherly ties between a strange man and a strange woman, and is the former considered a Mahram (unmarriageable) to the latter?

Such a relation between a strange man and a strange woman is forbidden in Islam because it involves forbidding what Allah has allowed by marriage, and allowing what Allah has forbidden such as looking and the like. Such a relation doesn`t render any act lawful between them, thus they are forbidden to look at each other, have a Khulwah (seclusion), and travel together.

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